DC,
do you like soup? I love soup. I just made some delicous chicken
soups. Would you Like some? --InsaneLane Phew, I
am glad I got rid of that yellow sword..... Sorry about earlier,
I'll give you money and shiny thinks to make it up. Are there
other swords to look out for? Let me guess, if I find them, you
want them? What the
deal with Pres. Bush.? He sucks!! He has no proof on Saddam Husein.
Do you think he ought to be impeached? Who in their
right mind back then looked at a cow, decided to squeeze its utters,
and drink the first white thing that came out?ChunkyFlamingoTesticles Do you consider
what Donnie sees (evil bunnie) in the movie Donnie Darko to be
all reality or some schizo sort of dream? ChunkyFlamingoTesticles elves are
huge kinda mini giants arent they, what has santa done to the
elves to make them so small they should be like waaaay taller
than me...err.. i fink..what has santa done to his elves to make
them sooo tiny? i bought
8 cans of pop at the dollar store.. does the cashier girl think
i'm weird? - Miss Roger's Sweater why does
my brother like watching 'maury povich' ?when it's obviously time
for the news..- Miss Roger's Sweater it was very
wrong to eat one of my brother's chocolate chip pancakes, right?
even though he offered it to me. that's a sure sign that it's
bad, right? - Miss Roger's Sweater Have you
ever had dolls laugh at you? Point and laugh and bleed from there
eyes? They come alive at night you know...and stand on the corner
of your bed...and laugh...laugh.....I can't take it anymore ><
- Kitty Sometimes
I start singing a random lines from random songs. What is my mom
thinking when I do this? McDiablo My cat just
puked, but now she is fine. Did her stomach have a moment of rebellion?
McDiablo How do you
know when you've eaten too many doughnuts? McDiablo I went to
this guys place, he was a big red dude that had goat horns and
goat legs. First he killed somebody I did not know, then he called
his right hand man a 'worm'. Now he went up to me and started
to beat the crap out of me, showed me his latest video of the
world been destroyed, he called it 'The Apocalypse', and then
kicked me out! Nice Guy! Do you know him? I didn't quite catch
his name. And why did I end up at his place in the first place? I'm curious
if it's so hard to do things right... I have this paper to write
till Friday, but I'm new to this - the subject and working and
stuff... I just have to write about something I don't know, scraping
things from books that go with software I don't have and have
never seen. And, as if that's not enough, the help that I was
supposed to get today vanished because someone forgot to make
a phone call yesterday. This guy who was supposed to help me is
some IT boss at the City Hall. He doesn't owe me anything (and
I don't think he likes me too much), but he owes our company,
represented by the guy who was supposed to call him yesterday
and tell him I'm going to ask him stuff. I went to talk to the
"IT boss" today and he sent me away, telling me that
he'll call the other guy and then... bah! And I'm stuck! Give
me a good excuse for my colleague to forget about the phone call.
(And don't be mean to me cause I wrote this much, I'm pissed and
feel like ranting.) - Omuletzu Please add
to the "people suck" list (if it's not there already):
1. People wo say 10 minutes and you end up waiting for 2 hours.
2. People who promise simple things, like making a phone call
and don't do it cause they were busy. How much time do you need
for a phone call anyway? 3. Cheap persons being in charge of the
firm's finances (the company car is always out of fuel, working
on old, worn out computers, if a computer breaks you must wait
for a month or more till it gets repaired, etc, etc). My question?
Does it get any better than this? - Omuletzu Have you
ever met someone who speaks like he knows everything? If you ask
him something he always has an answer and he tells it like it's
the absolute truth, like there's no doubt in the world... Should
I trust him? Is he God? - Omuletzun Do you ever
have to do stuff for your job but you don't have the proper tools
and documentation? - Omuletzu O mighty
DC, yesterday night I was chillin, playing hacky sack at 3 in
the morning. A man walked up and asked for change so gave it to
him. Another man walked up and gave me 2 dollars and said have
a better tomorrow, then another man walked up asked for a ciggarette,
so i gave it to him, and the 2 dollars. What does this all mean?
- JellyFishToast Have you
ever had a prosthetic? -JellyFishToast Do you think
the end of the world might come today? -JellyFishToast What do
you think of the name JellyFishToast o great sock monkey? i'm so happy,
my friend finally gave me the eminem cd i lent him. yaaaaay!!
aren't happy? irish psycho Would you
think that being a cashier you wouldn't hurt your self? I thought
that for about 1 day!~JeEpY!! HOw do you
stop yourself from cutting your fingers on bages of sugar that
old people keep bring up to buy???~JeEpY! i'm a freak
and i think everyone else just f%c&ing wierd they have no
soul no carisma why am i just in a dream Yeah, so
now I'm supposed to be waiting for a phone call from the guy who
forgets to... no, he was busy! Couldn't call from work and he
got home too late to call (11 PM). But he said he'll only call
me if he has to leave tomorrow... What if he doesn't call anyway?
Would that be a terrible psychological shock for me? Will I survive?
- Omuletzu you think
you're so bloody insane, do ya? well if you were going to initiate
me into the ranks of the insane - fear factor style - what so
called insanity of yours would i be up against? i havent
asked a question for a while, you miss me? -Lithanial which is
better oral sex or a handjob? - Lithanial Why does
my artwork suck so much? should i try and pass it off as 'modern'
art because its crap or just carry on relentlessly? - Lithanial do you think
mcdiablo and ms. rogers sweater will stalk me if i told them that
i worked at a 7-11 for 2 years, and got all the free slurpies
that i wanted? fucking
e-tards (ravers), why did they lick my monkey?- monkie boy Do you have
a water buffalo? FartMonkey Could I
be sued for putting dog crap on a stick and waving it at someone?
FartMonkey When you
delete stupid questions, where do they go? FartMonkey Who thought
of braces (the kind for teeth)? When? What were the first ones
made of? Who were they on? Did the installation involve large
amounts of heroin? FartMonkey The scissors
in front of me are secretly planning on attacking me and/or my
hair at any moment, right? McDiablo My brother
has played hockey for about five or six days in a row. He doesn't
have to play a game for three days. What should he do with himself?
McDiablo What will
happen after I complete my two essays, a screenplay, my books
and finish re-writing my short story? Will I have any brain power
left at all? McDiablo Why do I
feel as though somone is watching me? I turn to look out the window,
and no one is ever there...I even feel like somone is following
me when I am walking to the bus stop in the morning. Am I being
stalked by the physco squirrels? Are those
strange blobs and squiggly lines on pictures really ghosts...
or did Kodak screw up? ~NSuxbum Our school
really thinks we should have bomb drills... are they seriously
going to make us climb under our desks... and lock everything?
Do they seriously think this will stop it? NSuxbum are you emo? is today
a good day? irish psycho why the
hell does your site keep having problems? it's so fucking annoying!
i think i'm going to go puke now... irish psycho Doesn't
Ana want to be famous anymore? go leafs!!!!!
aren't you happy they beat the stupid bastard sabres? :) irish
psycho Have you
ever actually sat out in your car wearing sunglasses and pointed
a hairdryer at passing cars to see if they slow down, as is suggested
in that stupid chain email that I keep getting? FartMonkey How come
if "white is the mother of all colors" and all colors
are IN white, if I take all paint colors and mix them together,
I get a sick looking brown? FartMonkey If I go
out on my street corner and run in circles screaming hysterically,
how many laps will I be able to complete before I am shot at by
passing motorists/sedated by the authorities? FartMonkey How can
they do that? How could they? It's just the same old crap! They
just pasted on a different title! 17 times this has happened to
me! And for what? Just for that stinking donkey? And why should
I put up with it one instant longer? I very well may sue.. FartMonkey Which is
the most widely abused animal? FartMonkey why is it
that everytime i yell "You're a LIAR!" to somebody,
i automatically end up adding "...and a THIEF!" regardless
of whether they actually stole something or not? - SiNiSTaR why do stray
cats always look so gnarly compared to my fat pampered cats? -
SiNiSTaR i have a
stalker in college. o help me, please... what do i do to deter
him? any special witch's brew or sumthing? - SiNiSTaR Would you
stand up right now and do the Pac-Man dance? If you don't know
how that goes, could you do the macerena? Really, stand up right
now and dance for me. Clap your hands if you believe, children!
FartMonkey What do
you think of the Human Shields in Iraq? So it's
Monday already. If you start the week by answering the insane
questions, will you answer them every day till Sunday? - Omuletzu How can
I escape? - Omuletzu Could coffee
be good for me? Can it make me feel less sleepy? - Omuletzu For some
reason I really find other people's lives nteresting. Like, I
like being nosy and readinig JCP's diary thingy etc. My question
is...all people who type "lyke dis wiv u r gay n sux0r"
should be murdered. Agree or disagree? Reasons? Have you ever
completely followed anyone's instructions to the last detail?
FartMonkey
Hey, my
teachers always ask me what I'm going to do with myself when i
get out of college and I always reply Skateboard. They say I won't
go anywhere with that kind of job and i reply " Yeah well,
i will be making more money than your poor ass teacher job"
and they don't belive me. I've been skating for 7 years now and
i think i can get sponsored. Do you think i should keep going
for a sponsor or should i try moving out of my parents house and
try to quit mooching off of them and my friends and do something
with my life ?-NNY This is day five
of no question answerings. This may be my last entry. What's the
deal? FartMonkey shit! it's the
25th! are you getting lazy on us here?!? i'm getting desperate!!!
Please PLEASE answer the questions!!! irish psycho well...DC I'm
at the library...and i dun know what book to get...what book should
I get!?i tried "steal this book" but they wouldn't let
me...how i want that book...it's about anarchy..and how to cause
it..gosh i hate this country..halp!~SG* ^_^ what's the
best, fastest, easiest way to kill myself? i have iraqi
relatives, are they TOTALLY fucked? - Lithanial Has anyone
ever been killed by a small child going up to them, pointing their
index finger at them and shouting "bang bang you're dead,
fifty bullets in your head"? - Mzebonga is it possible
to fart faster than windspeed? and if so how fast can you fart?
- Lithanial dear dc,
why do stupid people pretend they know something when they know
nothing, and stand there saying (in a deep authorative tone:)
"Uh huh, yeeeeeeeesss" just because the boss came along,
when 5 mins earlier they couldn't even tie up their own shoelaces?
signed "need to know" and one
other question, why do those same people who couldn't even finish
their homework assignment because they were so stupid they were
trying to sum a formula in excel and didn't even know they had
a circular reference, then go "that was easy" when they
learned about pivot tables in class today, when you know they'll
be asking you to show them what to do next week? who would
win this fight? a ferocious silverback gorilla or a mighty lion?
thankyou o great one! hey dc...don't
u get sick of living in canada? i mean it snows like hell there...why
don't u move to some place warmer where u don't have to wear sweaters
and jackets and gloves and boots all the time? and shovel the
snow...live on coffee...(even though i love it)...-ice* dc, do u
have your pants especially tailored (with a hole in the back)
so that your sock monkey tail isn't squashed in your ass? do u
even wear pants at all? - zxq You say
DC stands for Demon Child, or is it a cover up for Dumb C***? Maybe I
should breed? I won the
lottery! do you want some of the money? - BD I have recently
decided to follow my life long dream and embark on a career in
the lucrative industry of video pornography. My problem is that
i cant think of a catchy porn star name to put on my resume. Is
'Sock Monkey' a registered trade mark? If not can I use it? Apparently
its impossible to keep your eyes open when you sneeze... but I
heard that if you force your eyelids open while sneezing the pressure
in the sinuses behind your eyes at the moment of the sneeze is
so great that it forces the eyeballs out of their sockets leaving
them to dangle around your face, still connected to the optic
nerve. Is this true? If so, would you then be able turn the eyeballs
around and look yourself in the face? - Gaylord Fauker On your
'Good Question Award' page there's a question about the Smurfs.
I just thought you should know that that line was ripped straight
from Donnie Darko. It doesn't deserve a good question award, its
not a good question, its just a bite on someone else's good work.
People who can't make a creative contribution shouldn't be praised
and awarded, they should be exposed for the frauds they are. In
my day to day life I come across so many of these f*#king phonies.
What is it with these people? Why are they compelled to act in
this way? What are they trying to prove? Do they honestly expect
anyone to take them seriously? Why are there so many of them around?
When someone is obviously spinning me a load of BS I'm truly offended
- there's something about fakeness and superficiality that just
makes me angry - i think its just an insult to a persons intelligence
when you bullshit them and expect them to believe it. But aside
from the anger, I'm more perplexed really - I don't understand
these people, what drives them to be like this? Wouldn't they
just be happier being themselves?? - GF Why does
my cat make this weird noise just before she is going to do something
bad, ie: Jump up on something she is not allowed to jump up on.
McDiablo Why does
my dad not wear his glasses when he knows that his vision is going?
McDiablo Is it really
a Timbit reality? McDiablo How much
money do you think I spend on Slurpees in a year? McDiablo Do you think
it will be the canadians or mexicans taking over the earth first?
~JeN Why can't
I live a Springer life? ~JeN ok now,
if i must say this , i will, but it doesnt seem at all required
of me. i should hope that it wouldnt be but all of you seem to
have to know what i am about to say. if , and i mean if, one day
there was a kid, and this kid was about 5, and he liked to play
with his little sister, and she was only 3, they had a small sandbox
they liked to play in together..and on wednesdays, they would
play house in it, you know that little kid game...balh im the
dad and i work and your the mom blah balh..., anyways, back to
the kid......taking all that into consideration, when would this
kid turn 12? I bring
you my question today in poetry form: Why
do you call it the insane domain? Its not insane its just plain
lame the sight of DC brings me pain His jokes are boring, tired
and tame So why do you call it the insane domain When its not
insane and just so lame? - Dr Suese I met a
duck at a bowling alley It had really big feet anyway it started
talking to me and now im being stalked what should I do? Are you
a lover of Tim Horton's doughnuts? McDiablo How often
have you set your fire alarm off? McDiablo Got any
phobias? McDiablo did you
steal my stapler? are you
just ducky today? i want sex,
no relationship, just hot wild sex, is anything wrong with me? DC, *sighs*
you told me and my lesbian friend to call you, well we tried,
your phone was cut off, did you forget to pay the bill?? Do i
have to move back in with you, so you can just be a bum and have
me pay all your bills? not that I mind, the sex is great!! -monkeeskittles did you
miss me DC? I missed you. I missed asking you stupid questions
when my computer broke. *crys* Such a happy reunion! Now, how
many licks does it take to get to the center of a Jalepeno?--Syko
Morgana Well, I'm
confused. Have you got any ideas? FartMonkey How come
every time I turn on this stupid computer I have to reset the
preferences? FartMonkey Why must
people type LiKe tHiS?- colbstar is a lamp
shade an appropriate hat?- colbstar Why do some
people who are supposedly good friends share awkward silences
once they run out of pathetic anecdotes which are the constituent
parts of what amounts to nothing more than a straightforward exchange
of crap information that serves to motivate their listless lives
as opposed to enjoying a passionate, engaging, producitve conversation?
hey is it
possible for you to go to jail if your over 18 and you talk to
some one online who you have never met and you just talk when i fill
out forms, under "race" i always put 'human'. what can
i put instead because i fucking hate admitting i'm human. - SiNiSTaR ok, I have
a few questions. #1-If a turtle doesnt have a shell is he naked
or homeless? Should I build him a house or buy him clothes? #2-ICQ
hates me, ever since my cat slept on the moniter it has not let
me on, did my cat had something to do with this? #3 If i was to
put toilet paper on my arms and open an umbrella and jump off
the house would i fly?-monkeeskittles what is
a fulfilling, appropriate, yet tasteful way of celebrating the
occasion of catching out the fat arsed know-all I mentioned to
you in my question to you last week, opening her big trap and
telling someone, "Oh that's easy"! so I got her and
told the person she was sprouting to in front of the boss, "ask
Allison, she'll show you" (false name used because her's
is so stupid) only to see her flapping (and she flaps!) around
trying to put her money where her mouth is? What sort of wine
would you suggest to go with what kind of savouries? Yours delightedly,
Staleywise. is lying
hound an adjective or a verb? yours in eager anticipation kind
regards, "Need to know" Why am I
obsessed with plucking things with tweezers?--Syko Morgana will you
dance with me and my pet duck rufus?--Syko Morgana is it humane
and funny to carry out amateur experiments on animals? - Lithanial I've been
crying every night since i touched gran, why did she get so angry? hi DC can
I come up to your place tonight?--Syko Morgana DC....its
me monkeeskittles! YAY! ok anyway, i was looking back at some
questions and i saw where you were selling mzebonga, this was
way back on like page 17 i think, anyway(heres where i ask my
question and you breathe a sigh of relief) Can i be sold too?
Ill make someone very happy. I mean Im smart, big boobs, insane,
what else could people want?? on a scale
of one to ten, how pathetic am I today? yours
pathetically, Ms Pathetic Since your
a vegeterian, do you ever eat those fake soy protein meats like
the Meatless Riblets(i just love that world, riblets) or the boca
burgers, do you like those?--Syko Morgana how do they
get those fake soy meats to feel so spongy and meat like? do you like
BBQ sauce?--Syko Morgana Did you
hear that Mr. Noodle from Sesame street died??Isnt that sad? Shouldnt
we all offer a moment of silence for Mr.Noodle?..*moment of silence.*;..................................................Okay,
lets fuck.--Syko Morgana would you
hate me if I joined the military?--Syko Morgana DC, how
come whenever I'm high I always make out faces of like the pink
panter and captain crunch in my food?--Syko Morgana What is
JCP going to do with that cup now that all of the crap is dumped
out?Surely nobody would drink out of it after it sat with rotted
contents for months..eww..--Syko Morgana Hey now...what's
with the pop up ads all of a sudden? FartMonkey I see. So
everybody's sick now. Even the questionnaire is about sickness.
Is VER sick too and if not, when will he be? - Omuletzu What would
you do if someone kidnapped you and made you watch Britney Spears
videos all the time? Ok, I know it's a Britney Spears question,
but... it's also a you question. - Omuletzu Why can
human senses be tricked so easily? - Omuletzu (Did you get this,
or my net died before??) I suppose
that, even with the rules written just near the question field,
you get a moderate amout of gibberish, repating questions, etc.
What do you do with those? Aren't some of those fun to read? -
Omuletzu You know,
you can find some conversation bots on the internet. You could
take one of those, feed every question and answer ever written
into his little file-based brain and then let it answer the insane
questions for you (or try at least). What do you say? (No, JCP
would not fire you and replace you with a robot, don't worry!)
- Omuletzu Is shopping
with someone better than shopping alone? - Omuletzu iS TyPiNg
LiKe tHiS a cRiMe aNd iF sO, uNdEr WhaT sEcTiOn aNd wHaT iS tHe
FiNe aNd oR MaNdaToRy SeNTeNcE? - SiNiSTaR syko morgana
is a lovely nickname. don't u agree? - SiNiSTaR my sister's
band is called 'beautiful disaster' and she's the bassist. whaddaya
think of the name? they won some battle of the bands thingy recently.
i am so proud. - SiNiSTaR why cant
i have a donkey?--Syko Morgana I dont believe
in god or the devil, is something wrong with me for that? My moms
said im going to hell cause i dont believe but how can i go somewhere
that i dont believe in? owwwwww
DC it bit me! why did it bite me? can you come and smush it? monkeeskittles why didn't
you display my question about touching my gran, man?!!! I need
to know!! Is there something you find abhorrent about grannytouching?!
You making out like im some kind of freak!!?Look, just give me
a straight answer, you know, i don't want to fuck with your shit
or anything, but you could be a lot more real with these people
who ask you questions...come on. how old
are you guys?
What are
seven alternate uses for a keyboard? FartMonkey Rolling
backpacks:A good thing? A bad thing? You don't care? FartMonkey Wait now...I
guess they're not rolling backpacks...cuz for it to be a backpack
it has to be....on your back...so really it's a floorpack? See
where I'm going here? FartMonkey What is
the most common misspelling of the word "a" ? FartMonkey I swear
the garden gnomes down the street change their facial expressions
every time I look at them. Are they plotting against me? Should
I make use of that big metal hammer in the garage? FartMonkey Can you
tell me about one of the instances in which you've shaken your
fist at someone/something today? If you haven't, you may shake
your fist at this being such a stupid question. FartMonkey Do you think
if I wear one of those mickey mouse hats from disneyland and stand
in front of a snake's cage at the zoo, it will strike up against
the glass because it thinks I am an enormous rat? FartMonkey DO'nt yOu
aGrEe tHat pEopLe wHO tYpE likE thiS aLL tHe tiMe NeeD tO bE shOt
rEpeAteDLy iN THe FacE? FartMonkey When you
die, does your cotton stuffing return to the earth from whence
it came? FartMonkey If I were
to send in two of the exact same question stating "Do you
ever get deja-vu?", would you delete one (or both) of them,
or get the joke, be a sport, and post both of them? FartMonkey
(Assuming you will go with the first option, I will not make an
attempt.) Since Americans
throw rice at weddings, do Orientals throw hamburgers? If you got
into a taxi and the driver started driving backward, would the
taxi driver end up owing you money? Do fish get cramps
after eating? when are
you going to post the ques./what if results for march? im pissing
my pants with excitement. i hope my answers went through!--Syko
Morgana Why is it
when a substitute teacher cant find you its your fault? (Could
it be because we were hiding under the stage with a few friends?)
giggle giggle...umm yea sorry... hmmm...~NSuxbum & Doucher Should the
damn freshmen get the money? or should we keep it and give some
of it to you?~NSuxbum & Doucher hmmm...what
would be a good fundraiser for money? NSuxbum & Doucher
My cat threw
up not once, not twice, but three times. After that, she ate some
food. What was the matter with her? McDiablo Is it weird
that I rarely use my credit card? McDiablo What's the
worst movie you've seen? McDiablo What the
hell was up w/ Frank in Donnie Darko? I don't know if it's because
I was really friggin tired when I watched that or what, but I
kinda get it (like the eye etc) but not the whole thing. Please
explain.
how much
would you charge me... or what would you charge me if i came to
live with you??? I dont like it here... people suck... I want
to be close to true insanity...please me me come... pleassseeee!~NSuxbum wooohoooo
i get to be sold:: does a little dance:: set my price please!!
monkeeskittles ps-um i have like 5 pairs of shoes and i will not
go shopping for them or anything, cept for food ;) "Look,
distraction Ninjas! <steals food>" What would you give
me out of 7 for my method? - Fido Dido Thankies
for the dinosaur head!!^_^ lol but you do know there are cameras
in the fire alarms right?..right?!BLOCK EM OFF!!!..or just flash
em...mehehe~SG* why do people
ask so many shitty questions? Does it
annoy you when people refer to "9-11"? Can't they think
of a better name for it? Even "That-Time-When-Those-Guys-In-Turbans-Hijacked-Planes-And-Knocked-Down-Them-Two-Buildings"?
FartMonkey If a monkey
on crack joined the FBI would he get arrested? Would you
kindly post this in order to tell Miss Roger's Sweater that I
ask so many questions because I have A) a curious nature B) had
a troubled childhood C) dyslexia and D) no concept of "too
many questions". Wait, that would be making this my personal
messaging board, wouldn't it? FartMonkey When you
have liposuction, they suck fat out of your butt and inject it
into your lips, then aren't people literally kissing your butt?
FartMonkey Are you
getting tired of people asking so many questions about why people
type LiKe tHiS? FartMonkey Would I
make a good canadian sock monkey? FartMonkey what do
you do when you have a huge zit on your face that starts talking
to you, and when you scold it in public people look at you funny
even though you have explained to them that your pimple was being
a rude sonofabitch, and you just wanted to teach it some manners?
- SiNiSTaR what do
you say to someone, when you ask them why the hell you should
go out with them, they start saying shit like, "Why!? Why
is the grass green? Why is the sky blue?" - SiNiSTaR Have you
been wondering where i've been? if my freaky guitar teacher has
abducted me with his cat pictures? - Miss Roger's Sweater can a keyboard
be sexy? cuz my mom got a new one and it has all these fancy buttons
and the top and bottom are blue, and i must say, it's a tad sexy,
for a keyboard. - Miss Roger's Sweater I have to
write my term paper this week for my 'philosophy of religion'
class. should i write it on karma or a limited god. help me out
here dc. - Miss Roger's Sweater dc, does
it piss you off when people ask question of their personal life
and the not so insane issues they have? nicki the sticky sockmonki How come
it doesn't rain donuts anymore?--Syko Morgana A while
back you told me that Sanimal has an exstenive collection of naked
pictures of B. Aurthur. Does he want to do some trading or selling?--Syko
Morgana Doesnt the
name Guy annoy you?--Syko Morgana Wouldnt
it be funny if I spontanesouly combusted from asking you too many
questions?--Syko Morgana Have you
ever had sex with an ice cream sandwhich??--Syko Morgana am i going
to be able to stay awake for my class today? people are doing
boring presentations that make me want to hurt someone... can
i hurt someone? - Miss Roger's Sweater do you enjoy
getting random cheques from the government too? - Miss Roger's
Sweater What should
I do about my pet human who keeps breaking out of her shell? What does
my laptop case look like a gangsta gun carrier? What do
you say to people who are obsessed with lord of the rings and
force their kids to read it, but then forbid their children to
read harry potter? It's all the same stuff, only stolen, with
different names, and less severe. What's with those people? FartMonkey Can I give
you some tips to making this domain even more insane. 1) more
midgets - my theory is anything can be improved by increasing
the midget factor, i.e. midgets riding skateboards, midgets in
sock monkey porn, pictures of various midgets just standing around,
whatever. When I see this site I say, "yeah, its pretty insane,
but it's just not 'midgety' enough", the migeticity just
isn't there. 2) One word, Vomit. This site is desperately lacking
in the big V, chunder, puke, barf, yack whatever you wanna call
it, you need more of it. Instead of this boring old black background
how about a spewlicious technicolor vomitscape? Or even better
a 'rate my retch' section where people send in pics of their favorite
pavement pizza and we rate them! 3) More nudity - well, its not
really insane but it couldn't hurt. 4).Drugs and alcohol - nothing
says insanity more than a bit of drug induced psychosis. How about
giving all the kiddies out there a real taste of insanity. Hang
around outside your local pre-school and hand out a few 'party
sweets', then film the hilarious results! Pre-schoolers whacked
up on goof-balls, now I'd pay to see that! . Then when their done
your bound to have some valuable material for the 'Rate my Retch'
section as well. Bonus!! 5). Hidden cameras - anything involving
a hidden camera is funny, the comedic possibilities are limitless:
hidden toilet cam, hidden bathroom cam, hidden midget cam... whatever.
Any combination of these of these five essentials is bound to
be a winner. Here's an idea: you go Big Brother style and cram
a bunch of naked midgets into a house full of hidden cameras.
Then you get 'em drunk and lace their drinking water with LSD
whilst hidden toilet bowl cams take snapshots of their midget
chunderspew for us to rate! Now that’s entertainment! Anyway
dude, think about it. - Chunderspew So what
do you guys do apart from this site? Are any of you hot? would
you go out with me? - Batman (nananananana) You say
you require large amounts of money for sexual favors - do you
except midgets as payment? why do you
give good question awards to crap questions? example: "I
asked a question a few months ago. And it never appeared. Is it
because I'm a white powder that has yet to blossom into manhood?
Anthrax.Boy" received the only good question award of the
20 or so questions in the last batch. How is this a good question?
Isn't it true that the good question award is just a sham? Do
you even read the questions? Are you already using that automatic
question answering program thing that that guy was talking about?
If you are I think its broken. Why do gay
guys talk in that lispy big gay Al way - girls don't speak like
that so where do they get it from? why is the
good question award an ugly ass vultue head? DC are you
insane as in mentally unstable or just in the whacky and zany
sense? why is it
that when i've got heaps of homework to do i suddenly have the
urge to waste hours abusing people in chats and asking inane little
sock monkeys stupid questions - yet i would never do these things
at any other time because their pointless and boring?? - Batman
(na na na na na na na na na) hey listen
to this if you dont strip naked for me ill throw animal crackers
at you and i just might spank you too how do you like that?!?!--Syko
Morgana Well all
my friends are back home from the chorus trip to Virginia... They
seem to had lots of fun.... Did they miss me at all? :-( ~NSuxbum where is
the spot on a girls pussy that makes the cum uncontolably??? stephen What do
you get when you cross an overweight camel with a turkey named
George, then take the result of that cross and cross it with a
Hostess twinkie? This isn't one of those dumb jokes.. well it's
dumb but it isn't a joke...but I really want to know..FartMonkey My sister's
social studies teacher has a 'thing' about doing a bibliography
perfectly. He even pulls out a magnifying glass to check and see
if there are five character-long spaces from the margin when starting
a new line. Is it safe to say that he's a little ... mentally
unstable? McDiablo Can you
tell me who invented internet slang so I can go out and hurt them?
McDiablo Were you
too cool to watch the Junos, or did you actually sit down and
indulge in some Canadian music? McDiablo What's wrong
with driving a Honda Civic? - Omuletzu are you annoyed
by an abundance of politcal questions yet?i am... which is
better? a life filled with dreams or one filled with theinsanedomain?
GAH...
i should be in school about an hour..i have to walk but im praying
i dont, its so hard on the feet.I need a ride..so dc pop o on
over have some tea and drive me to school on your way home, k? what you
mean NO experiments? not even trying to find out if kowala bears
explode in forest fires? eucalyptis trees do because of all the
oil in them and since kowalas only eat eucalyptis leave they surely
must explode too? right? surely its worth testing? - Lithanial have you
had sex with a real person dc? If not, why haven't you?? Why do we
have to work 5 days a week, dont you think itd be better to work
2-3 days a week, and have 4 days off? I mean theres enough people
to do that right? -JellyFishToast Do you think
scrub a dub ever died? -JellyFishToast What would
happen to a sock monkey if he went through a black hole? -JellyFishToast There are
crazy men around me talking in wierd fake accents and are downloading
wierd sounds from their laptops...should i just sit here pretending
nothing is going on? i really am quite scared- colbstar if a friend
calls another friend's dad "cute" by accident..how should
you react?- colbstar yes..Today
was Mardi Gras day!at school...and i got beads...but i didn't
flash...why oh why did so many guys and girls give me beads?...~SG* I have a
What If for you...what if I found a question in the Questionnaire
format in the What If section? Would your world be turned upside
down? Or is it just the opium? FartMonkey Well what
IS up with these pop up ads? They only come up when this site
is up, and I don't have any other pages up or new programs...is
it the government? My english teacher? Opium? FartMonkey isnt angelina
jolie spicy and deviously hot?--Syko Morgana Will you
scratch my back?--Syko Morgana Would you
have any idea why JCP wrote in her "horses are evil"
page that if I don't agree with the stuff there, I am one or more
of the following things, and one of the following things is "under
the influence of horses or horses"? Aren't horses and horses
the same thing? If there is a difference, could you tell me whether
I am under the influence of horses, or horses? Oh wait, I'm not
under the influence of anything...except sock monkeys and cheese...FartMonkey Can you
write some more damned shrink stories or insane sock monkey stories?
FartMonkey Are you
watching the Stanley Cup playoffs, or do you care less? McDiablo My mom made
a salad in less than two minutes. Should she get a cookie for
doing that? McDiablo What does
one do in order to get that garlic bread taste out of their mouth?
McDiablo Why won't
they stop staring? Why won't they all just leave me alone? FartMonkey I think
life is just death's waiting room, and the crap we have to deal
with every day is just the same old tattered boring magazines
that it contains. Plus you pick up diseases from other people
in waiting rooms...that just makes things more fun while you wait
to die...well I have to make this a question somehow...I'll just
ask if you agree. Do you agree? FartMonkey Aren't you
fed up with humans? I sure am. Why should my life be controlled
by people I don't even know about? Like money. Why should I have
money? Money is of no value to me. They tell us to value it, and
we obey like the sheep that we are. Then we get in fights over
it. Then we kill eachother over it. Why? It's little piecies of
paper. I'm going to start my own little world. There will be no
money. If there were money, I would think coins would be worth
more than bills...they're prettier..and they make a happy jingling
sound. Then so do the little tabs off of soda cans. Also in my
world there will be no politics. People deciding who's better
than everybody else just because they know more people. They are
such idiots. There won't be the media either. Telling me that
I have to have straight teeth and being ugly is bad. What do I
need with the media? It's just there to make me feel bad. There
will be no concept of rich. Who cares who has more little papers
with pictures of dead presidents on them? It doesn't make you
a better person. It just makes me laugh at them because they think
they are better than me because they have a lot of those little
papers, or a big paper saying that they have a lot of those little
papers. Idiots. Nobody else will tell me what is bad. That's what
THEY think is bad. I will decide for myself what I think is bad.
Telling me something is bad only means YOU think it is bad, and
that only makes me question it. When I rant like this, I figure
that I just will stop caring what people think of me. I tell them
that. Then I can tell they think I'm crazy. I think I'm crazy.
But then I think no, I'm right! But they think I'm weird. Ok,
then I'm wierd. I have my own ideas. They all can obey all the
crap just because some unknown force tells them to. I'm fed up
with humans. Thank you. FartMonkey "When
you have liposuction, they suck fat out of your butt and inject
it into your lips, then aren't people literally kissing your butt?
FartMonkey" FartMonkey
is the one who kept on talking about "SUCK THE FAT"
a few weeks back! Should we beat him up? whats the
most idiotic thign you've done in the last 3 days?--Syko Morgana When we
die are we going to become God's like of peanut butter or our
favorite things like God of the Insane Domain and stuff??--Syko
Morgana
We tend
to scoff at the beliefs of the ancients. But we can't scoff at
them personally, to their faces, and this is what annoys me. Is
there any way I can do it? Though I
do agree that I could use a good sound beating, when WAS I talking
about "SUCK THE FAT"? Was I really? Or was it just an
opium-induced dream that whoever asked that question had? FartMonkey I'm going
to the store... you want anything? FartMonkey What should
I hang all over my cieling in an effort to make my room more insane?
FartMonkey i finished
my last class tonight.. should i celebrate even though i still
have exams? - Miss Roger's Sweater do i have
hockey on the brain too much when i start thinking of exams as
the 'playoffs' and i finished my 'regular season' classes tonight?
- Miss Roger's Sweater yesterday
i did a presentation in english class and there was this guy who
is a really big dork and he pissed us off cuz he was lame and
didn't want to participate with the rest of the group and everyone
hated him. can i kick him in the nuts? -Miss Roger's Sweater I'm so pissed
off right now I could break some necks! But do I have the right
to complain? Nooo! I feel I should be out there stealing, ripping
people off - that's the way to do it nowadays! If you want the
good life you have to steal, not to work like everybody else.
Every day I hear about illegal stuff, people stealing billions
from public money and at the same time the government says they'll
add a new tax on something. Yeah, that's it! They need more public
money to steal! Lemme tell you a small story (not about public
money). I had this card from this bank. It wasn't a credit card,
it was just used to take money that I already had from an ATM.
They started sending me my account balance by mail - every letter
cost me something. I wrote them not to send me those anymore -
they kept on sending them. I went to the bank and told them I
want my account closed but that I had lost the card. They todl
me I have to pay *** (debt). I did. They kept sending me the mail
until I got some more debt. Went and gave them the card (found
it) and closed the account AGAIN! Got another one of those papers
- I still ow them money. What should I do? Go and shove all those
pieces of paper down the throat of that guy who closed my account
the last two times? Burn down the bank? Sue them? Talk to the
manager? Go and make a monster scandal till they come and take
me out with the police? - Omuletzu why are
you so against animal experimentation? insulin used to be gathered
by butchering pigs for theyre pancreases by the thousands to keep
all our diabetics alive before genetics came about. so surely
the world wont miss just ONE kowala! - Lithanial A question
about life... I know this guy who has Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis.
He'll die sooner or later, but until he dies he's miserable and
he makes everyone else's life horrible. I lack the words to describe
it. All I can say is I think he'd be better dead than the way
he is now - complete paralysis, not being able to eat or breathe
right. He'll probably die of suffocation after months of being
like this... And we would still call it murder if someone decided
to end his misery! And we still hope and pray and wait and wait
and... It sucks! What's the solution for something like that?
- Omuletzu I'd really
like to find out why people choose to ignore me. How can I do
that? - Omuletzu I don't
know what to ask, but I'm not feeling any better. It doesn't mean
that I'm calm, it means that I can't express my rage. I should
really learn how to do it. Maybe I could make a really sturdy
sock monkey and start kicking it around every time I'm angry.
Would that be so bad? I mean I try to live in the real world and
they don't think of sock monkeys as beings - more like toys. Hey!
Why am I writing about sock monkeys? Why am I writing about myself?
Am I self-centered? Am I supposed to be selfless when everybody
else is egocentric? I have yet to meet someone who wants what's
good for me (excepting my parents). Is it a bit too late to be
asking these questions (I'm 25)? - Omuletzu I'm not
done yet! Yeah, I've got issues and these questions are a way
to sort them out. Yep, you missed your career with me. You should
have been a psychiatrist. My question? Yeah, I know I write too
many words meaning nothing. It's one of my many flaws. What's
my purpose in life? Do I even have one? Does anyone? - Omuletzu You know
that red is an angry color. Will you ever make a more mellow layout
with blues and greens? Is there
really such a thing as Dark Matter or all those scientists just
'hypothesizing' (ie- making up stuff) so they don't have to admit
the old theorems don't work on that level (macro-space, or something
sciency like that) and they simply don't know how to get the right
answer without making up some 'mystical' element that permeated
the entire universe yet can't be detected *directly* with their
equipment? --Riku what's the
best way to terminate all hair growth in your nose?--quite smart,
but it's well hidden If a squirrel
that has no sense of smell farts in the forest and nobody is around,
does it really smell? FartMonkey Ok, I've
got the wires connected...what do I do now? FartMonkey The next
time I pick up the phone and it turns out to be a telemarketer,
I plan to shriek directly into the phone as loud as I can, then
pour molten iron into the mouthpiece. Is this OK? FartMonkey Which of
these sounds, like, more correcter to you?: "Before he died,
Jim was an active person." or "Jim was an active person
before he died." Also does it matter that Jim died because
I killed him? FartMonkey My sister
is fascinated by this thing where a guy is blabbing about what
this guy is "building in there?" In the end, after all
that blabbing, the dude doesn't even say what the guy IS building.
How stupid is that? McDiablo Can one
hurt themselves from bobbing their heads too much? McDiablo What do
you think of a guy whose lawn is dying? McDiablo Why is there
a lock and an emergency handle on the back of school buses? If
you're going to steal one you just turn the emergency handle and
it opens. So what's the need for the lock? i want to
kill my computer. will you come kill it for me?????? irish psycho
Would "The
Insane Domain: where insanity runs rampant...and so can you"
indicate that I can only run rampant within this site? Or does
it mean that if I'm insane I can run rampant anywhere, and this
is just a very good place to do it? FartMonkey How many
times would a donkey dance if he could relaly actually dance?--Syko
Morgana Do noodles
dance when you arent watching?--Syko Morgana if paranoia
is a good sign that you are sane, what is a good sign of insanity
and why? because people keep telling me stop being so paranoid
u insane peice of shit, it confuses me so? can you help oh great
one? oh and i might be able to help you with that playstation
2 and gta3 Hey DC,
should I have this wart removed? I think maybe it's posessed by
evil clown demons. FartMonkey |
||
Yeah,
I thought I'd ask something else... cause you didn't answer yet
and the probability of you answering these questions is increasing
rapidly. Only... I have no idea what to ask. So I'm thinking,
don't rush me! I feel sick, a bit dizzy and cold and warm at the
same time. That sould help me come up with a question... Damn!
It doesn't help. Ok, yeah. A question about photosynthesis. Or
maybe not. Why the @^#)@(&# is photosynthesis so interesting
that ppl would ask so many questions about it and you would have
to say you're not answering any more question about it??? I don't
get it? And what could someone rant about the sterilized needles
before the lethal injection and... Do ppl seek your acceptance?
Do they desperately need the good question award to be able to
live their miserable lives? By the way, the back of my head hurts
now. Gimme a few names of actors who don't suck horribly (you'll
probably post a link to some page on this site - don't! Those
are probably the ones you like. What abou the ones you don't mind
seeing?). Ok, I'll end my pathetic question stream now. - Omuletzu
how
can i lose weight~i really want to starve myself in order to lose
a lot of weight in a little amount of time! pleaz help!! angelbabe