actually that wouldn't make her leave cuz her fave color is green...anything else?~SG*
badly painted fencing

why is classical music so dang hard to play? - Miss Roger's Sweater
its hard to place all those instruments at once

is it bad when your mom fixes a computer problem that has been around for many months and your computer literate brother has not been able to fix it? - Miss Roger's Sweater
i say good for your mom and don't let your brother touch your computer anymore

at this moment i don't have homework to do.. has hell frozen over? - Miss Roger's Sweater
if hell froze over the leafs would have won the cup...

is it ok to listen to cds that have been collecting dust but still rock major ass? - Miss Roger's Sweater
yes of course

you're an emo monkey aren't you? - Miss Roger's Sweater
hell no

every time i masturbate i get this tingle in my groin, also white pus comes out, and afterwards its all red and sensitive, do you have this problem? -monkie boy
no i don't have that problem exactly... have you tried asking for help from a family member?

What exactly is the population of Liechtenstein? IS Boris the God There? What is his surname? Why is your name not Helga?
no idea... could be... not sure... and you have no proof

a *friend* of mine yelled at me today, for no good reason, i now have this urge to bash her head in, with a rusty chair (shut up, i know how stupid *rusty chair* sounds.) and i'm probably going to do it, do you think that her yelling at me for no reason justifies me causing her grave bodily harm? maybe i should opt for a less violent course of action? what do you suggest, i need to know soon, cuz i gotta go to the dentist after lunch.-marissa
i say just leave her alone until she snaps out of the 'bitch-on' she has going... she obviously has issues

Miss Roger's Sweater and I have Psychology class together. We usually watch a video and during that time we get rather giggly. The videos are so funny! My question is, how come the rest of the class isn't laughing? McDiablo
the rest of the class are just robots... they are all recording your reactions for an alien species

Am I still above average even though I got below class average on my midterm? McDiablo
of course... that's just a piece of paper

Hey, y'all know what...I CAN believe it's not butter. Who's with me? Yeah! FartMonkey
i've had enough with the butter and it's yellowish bits

Mind you, before you delete this, yes there is a short story first, but there IS a question at the end, so you just go on and live through it. Ok, so yesterday I was painting the house and I saw a black cat running in circles around it. I decided to go see if something was wrong, cuz you know, since they're taking over the world, it wouldn't hurt a little ole sock monkey to help one out. So I step under the ladder, which falls, and bursts into flames, burning a small patch of four-leaf clovers. Then all these horseshoes start falling from the sky directly on my head- nails sticking out and all- and I get knocked out. Then I wake up, groggy and all, and I soon figure out that I am on a tiny island with some other sock monkeys and a bunch of cats. Now I have two questions: A)Is this some phase of isolating all us sock monkeys so we won't be harmed during the cat-world-overtaking? and B) If so, will you be there? Or are you there and I have just not located you yet? FartMonkey
yes of course... and no i have other things to attend to

Did you recieve my shipment of shrunken heads this week? FartMonkey
no not yet

I think my english teacher is crazy but in a non-fun way. She frequently runs through the forest reciting comma rules to herself and keeps getting shot by Bambi. Should I bring tranquilizer darts to class? FartMonkey
yes you should... !

what do you think about that guys prediction that the world would end in 2012?i think his name starts with a N..you know him.So do you think its true or not?
i think that if it is then good for the earth... but lets face it... it will probably just be humankind hobbling themselves again with something stupid and then forget all about it and then do it again

Does this look infected?--A/C--
yes actually...

What must one do to become listed as a 'cool viewer'?FartMonkey
well since we're lazy and stuff... i would have to suggest sending in some cash with your name and some notes telling us to do it

Are there levels to insanity, or is it just a general thing? Can it be turned on and off? I, of course, am truly insane...you said so yourself, DC..I just want to know more about the insanity of others. FartMonkey
there are levels to insanity... and sometimes...

i think im insane. im pretty sure about it. but would i actually know for definate? do insane people know they are insane? or is it a sane decision to decide that you are insane. love from the queen of the arctic ass monkeys ps would you like to become the king of the arctic ass monkeys? thats kind of a secondary question.
well its kind of hard to describe while i'm tired and trying to get through these questions... but i will try to make an article about the types of insanity there are... and ok

i worked it out! i am the lap dancing sock monkey! oh dear satan ive seen the light! (thats right isnt it?)
yes that is correct

geez, why is everything so big??? anyway, what i really wanted to ask is, what happened to the horoscopes? i really looked forward to reading those... -marissa
what and i put them back just for you

i saw this porn with girls pissing in a glass and drinking it, it was really disgusting. but on that same porn site i found alot of stuff that i liked. do you think i should go back to the site and risk seeing some sick ass porn? just for the good stuff? (kult0vazazel)
just go to the bits you like... and do not visit the bits you don't

hey i think this website is a real wast of space and money. do you actually pay for this so that all your school buddys can come on here and ask retarded questions that seriously make me question their sexuality? or is this some free thing? please let me know so i know weather to laugh my ass off and make fun of everything about this site or to say"oh at least hes not paying for it" (kult0vazazel)
this is quite funny

Do you treat women like the rest of the world treats toilet paper? McDiablo
no

Should I just take off my pants and stand on my head? McDiablo
no you should be building things out of twigs

preps are every where. ihate them. they steal our ideas and our stuff. why cant they go away?
they will soon enough...

Ok if figured it out. I think this is a collective dream. We are all in the same dream. None of us control it. It is free space. The only way to fix it is to kill every thing. This would eliminate the space our minds have created for us. Then and only then might we wake up. Wont that be nice to wake up in a soft white paded room. With only our insanity to keep us company. Plesant dreams? - (Nameless)
sounds good...

why does alcohol kill brain cells? can you hear them scream before they die like i do?- monkie boy
i used to but i pretty much beat them into submission

do you think fred durst of limp bizkit has q-tips stuck all in the wrong orafaces?-weirdofreako
yes

why does thai food have to be so damn spicy? it makes my farts kinda juicy and burning-monkie boy
thats what you get for eating it... and admit it... you love it

isnt beer and pizza the best thing ever invented by man? and why is hawian pizza made with canadian bacon and not hawian bacon?
no and yes... and i don't eat the bacon so i don't know

i like to watch shit fall out my ass. Is there anything wrong wit that ?
no... what you do in your bathroom is your business

2 milion people play the game NeoPets. 4/6 of them are over the age of 18. Tell me, isn't there something wrong with that ?
i think there is something wrong with 2 million people in general

when will i learn ?
never

Please define a few words for me. God,Religion,death,afterlife,agnostic, and hell.
mythical figure, reason to kill, escape from this, no idea, a choice, state of mind

Don't you think the word "LOVE" is abused. I make this statement, because guys/dudes only say it to get more of what they want from a chick/girl. And if girls do that, then well, some one should pay them right? So, is it or is it not an abused word?--Retarded Monkey Queen
it is an abused word by most people yes

can I set up your chat network?
um...

What are your feelings towards toe jam, feces, and Pine Sol? FartMonkey
pass, it smells, it stinks

Most things need wings to fly. But penguins have wings and can't fly. Superman has no wings, but he can fly. Isn't this unfair? Or is it because Superman is really just standing in front of a blue studio screen and the image is put in behind him? FartMonkey
yes its unfair but let's face it... those damn penguins know EXACTLY why they can't fly

I feel that my ears are much too large. Is there any way that you could help me correct this imbalance?FartMonkey
no... you are wrong... your face is too small.. your ears are fine

Have you seen "Signs"?? Usually I think SAnimal's a moron but for once I actually agree that it was dumb! What the hell were they gonna do come winter when it snows and turns to WATER? Or when it RAINS?
yes i have and i thought it was dumb too... it's like they didn't even try

Why can't people return the stuff they take from my room? Huh? HUH??? McDiablo
they are JERKS... all of them

Two Disney movies in one day? STOP THE MADNESS!!! McDiablo
nooooooooo not disney!

Where's the cat? McDiablo
sleeping on the couch... shhhhhhhh

What does it mean when people do that hand symbol where they hold up their pinkie and index fingers? Is it a gang symbol? STRAF
i have no idea... just ignore them and their shit

What have us Americans got against Canadians? Canada is our #1 source of Canadians such as Avril Lavigne and this fine natural deposit of insanity. What are we supposed to be making fun of? Do you dress funny? I don't get it. FartMonkey
i say you're just upset that we've got an easier flag to draw

How do I fix my garbage disposal?
jam glass into it

please lemme set up your chat network :), does that mean we can ask u questions in realtime ?
well i'd have to BE there then at certain time and that sucks for me...

why is my love bird humping my foot? ~A/C~
it LOVES you

I farted and it really smells, do u think it is possible for me to passout and die?? ... orhhh.. neve r m i n d
yes i do

i am a very very very very very very horny chick! DC...will u help me with my problem?? I want to have your little sock monkeys! Anything you want and its yours!---monkeeskittles
i'd like lots of money, some pizza and some more computer parts

my brother was talking like a pimply faced 16 year old in puberty.. huh? - Miss Roger's Sweater
tell him to talk to the hand

would you like to dip a fried cricket in fondue? - Miss Roger's Sweater
no

do you dislike dr.phil as much as i do? - Miss Roger's Sweater
i watched five minutes of him because i couldn't find the changer... and those 5 minutes really sucked and i do not like him at all

is it bad that my aunt had to physically drag me out of bed this morning to get me up.. it was 11am.. i don't usually sleep in that late at all.. - Miss Roger's Sweater
thats not bad... dr phil was bad

why am i enjoying jeans so much these days? - Miss Roger's Sweater
they're absorbant

Yes I to think you should have a chat room just for the patrons of the insane domain. Then we could all converse on previous questions and other things. I know you may be ocupied by other things such as maintaining the curent site. But this would be a good thing.
i think we should to... but i actually think a newsgroup format would do better... too bad the yahoo group sucks so much cuz yahoo sucks...

It itches. How do I stop the itching? (Nameless)
use a fork... and fire cleans everything

My mother doesn't want a cat in her house... is that bad? What will happen to her when the cats take over the world? What will happen to ppl who are alergic to cats and the ones who prefer dogs? (Omuletzu)
yes it is bad unless she is allergic ... then it's just too bad

DC I want a bag of hair. where can I get a bag of hair?
send me money and i'll send you a bag of hair

Explain to me the phrase "new and improved" if somethings new, theres been onthing before it and it cant be improved..
they are LIARS so any company that puts it on there is insulting your intelligence and don't buy it

Did you ever jizz in someone's food? - Mzebonga
no... WOULD i? yes... would you like to come over for dinner?

After school I saw a dead squirrel and brought it home.And then a dead dog too for some odd reason...Now I don't know what to do with them.Do ya want me to try to mail it too you even if they don't let me send it?-Skittles
no i don't want more... i say you dress them up and play 'tea time'

how do spider monkeys protect themself
they use blow darts with poison tips

on a rare serious note, I was wondering if you knew it anything has happened to OMGjeremy.com. I got a link from that site to here but it seems not to be working. Is this just my browser or have they shut down?
works for me

Im supposed to go to the dentist next week.I keep dreaming that he's gonna kill me.Is that true? - The Cheese Mister
well yes but not next week

Y'all say you have other jobs besides working on the insane domain...what are your jobs? Does Sanimal work for minimum wage cleaning gas station toilets and collecting dog waste? Or am I way overestimating? Does he even work? FartMonkey
yes we do if you can believe it... i work as a web consultant (hows that for an overused job title), jcp helps run two different companies, and sanimal blows goats for five cents

what characteristics does the almighty and wonderful DC look for in a potential life long partner? love from the queen of the arctic ass monkeys xx
a) brain that works b) non-religious c) healthy tail

Yay!Thank you DC she ran out of the room screaming ^_^ oh ya you are da sock monkey!*hugs DC*~SG*
alrighty then

Is my question real more pathetic that your answer ?
yes it is

Do tape worms spawn from my ass ?
no they spawn from deep within the ground and crawl up into your ass for warmth

I dont like fish do you ?
no i don't

So im walking down the SKREET and i meet a tall guy holding his "johnsen" and he says to me " Hey Yo. What is up my dog. Can you spare me 32 cents? Or would you like to buy a dime ?". I answer " Pardon me sir but my name is not you but it is Christopher. Maybe you have mistaken me for someone else," . But then he says " Come one yo gimmie some dough or am i going to have to call my peeps on you ?" . "Oh maybe you think im the baker he lives down the street... and what are you going to do with your sugar coated marshmellow treets?" i mentioned. but he came closer to me and said " All right brother i am going to have to rock you. Maybe i should knife you up instead!" He treatened. I stared and said " i am not your brother sir , And i belive you should learn better grammar. I must leave now i have to make it to the star trek convention before 2'oclock. Pardon me please" i said. " Alright you want start some ? Ok you better watch out for your ass. Stay out of my hood dog! Or else you gonna find your ass large and raped." He screamed as he pushed me and ran into his car. Why did he tell me to stay out of his coat and who are his sugar coated marshmellow freinds?
i'm not sure but he seems to have some serious issues and should probably be put into a straightjacket to stop him from hurting himself or others

crunchy or creamy peanut butter
creamy

How come even though people suck everywhere, and even all suck along the same themes such as backstabbing, lying, cheating, torturing,killing etc., they still find particular instances, in which to suck, that hurt your brain in some fresh and unexpected way, on a regular basis? How come it's not really enough just to know that where ever you go, whatever your job is, where there's people, rich, poor, black, white, gay, straight, etc. there's going to be sucking? The Tao of Sucking seems to be that The Sucking never ends. --Enfante Terrible
it will end when all humans are put to an end... and since you're not even off the planet yet... it will happen sooner then you think

my doctor is understanding of my lack of enthusiasm of needles.. do you think that flu shots are relevant? - Miss Roger's Sweater
i think that i don't know enough about it but i personally do not get one... as for needles i don't really care

is it ok for me to whine about my arm hurting from my stupid flu shot? - Miss Roger's Sweater
no not really... you're the one who let them jab it into you

is it bad that i can drive fine after getting my flu shot but my walking isn't very straight? - Miss Roger's Sweater
yes! run away!

can u tell me about the sexualy transmited desise crabs, coz I need 2 no 4 me collage work. can u help??????????
no i won't help you due to your using numbers as words

if cheese is really mold then why cant you just eat the mold that grows on the cheese?
it's not orange

can i eat sushi off your naked body?
no sushi is not allowed on my body

DC, your mom told me that DC really stands for Dale Charles. Is your name really Dale Charles?Why did you lie?
i didn't YOU lied you LIAR

Hiya!Ive just started dating this lad and I was just wondering if he really DOES like me or if he's just messing me about?Oh and should I kill Shania Twain if I see her? - The Cheese Mister
blah to the first bit... and of course

i like skittles. do you like skittles
not really no

What's my ICQ number? - Mzebonga
i'd tell you but then you'd know and then you'd know i know that you know

Is it so wrong to talk about, er, 'inadequate shrinkage' in Literature class? McDiablo
hell no

Was the speaker a girl or a guy?? McDiablo
a bit of both but mostly guy

What the hell am I supposed to make for dinner? McDiablo
food... or some wood carvings

My cat is just too cute ... could anything be else be cuter than a cat? McDiablo
of course not

If I see Shania Twain should I kill her?And also why is cheese yellow? - The Cheese Mister (cheers for your answer)
of course and it's orange because they make it that color for some dumbass reason

Who is your favourite poet? If you don't like poetry, who is your favourite songwriter? If you don't like songs ... pretend this question didn't exist. McDiablo
i'd have to say pattons lyrics when he actually writes words... some of korns and mansons lyrics are good too... i don't really know any 'poets' off the top of my head

Is it so wrong that my mom, sister and I have code names for feminine products? McDiablo
hell no

How much do you want to bet that when people write 'lol' they really AREN'T laughing out loud? McDiablo
they aren't, they are lying, they are LIARS so i would bet a lot

So, basically we should just shut up and send gifts and money? --Enfante Terrible
that sounds like a great idea... let's all do that... right NOW NOW NOW NOW

I have neglected to send you those BIOHAZARD stickers and other strange gifts I have been hoarding for you. This is a way in which I have been sucking, isn't it?
yes it is actually but that's ok for now... i'll still allow you to send them to me

Are you ever going to write more parts to anymoment? I liked it. I know I should probably send those gifts before I ask all of this mercy and labor from you but, again, as you have helped me to see, I suck. I will only say in my defense that at least I swallow. --Enfante Terrible
yes actually there is one more part and then the last one which hasn't been written yet... and i am being teased by all you with promises of gifts...

As a scholar of all that sucks, do you feel that global sucking is the result of modern civilization's failure to worship cats as the Egyptians did Bastet, or was it the sucking that led humanity to abandon The One True Faith? --Enfante Terrible
i'd have to say both are the same thing... we should be worshipping the cats as the one true faith

Did donuts come from Socrates?
only the ones with the holes

why does this little blonde haired guy keep telling me to start fires?
so THAT'S where he is... i was beginning to worry

What do you think of lemonade?
i am a strong supporter of the 'real lemonade' cause...

I was at 7-11 and some kid came up to me and stole my ham and cheese bagel right out of my hands. what should i do?
demand an apology and a slurpee

How long are you supposed to keep Britney Spears' head in the microwave before it explodes? --Enfante Terrible
about a minute... there isn't much in there

Do you really hate humans or are you just saying that to get laid? --Enfante Terrible
i wasn't aware saying that could get me laid... so now i have two reasons to say it

Should I get one of those barbie doll make-up heads and paint creepy symbols all over it and burry it with the just the hair sticking out next to a pile of stick figures and rocks on the front lawn of where I work to freak out the ignorant assholes that I work with? Any other suggestions? --Enfante Terrible
that's a pretty good one... i'd like pictures of it

Okay, I was sitting at the breakfast table one morning. There was a bagel there too. It was just sitting there (Just like me, right?). Anyway, I got mad so I yelled, "Mock me fucking bagel?!" Afterwards I felt really bad. What should I do?
eat it ... but put something on it first so it doesn't feel so bad... peanut butter might do it... if not then some butter... if its not happy still then leave it under someone's pillow

Why do they call it Canadian Bacon? I live in Canada and i hardly ever see it on the menu here. Yet everywhere in the States serves Canadian bacon. MrSelfDestruct
i have no idea actually... probably like how french fries aren't from france

DC, when the world is taken over by sock monkeys such as yourself and the humans are extinct, what will happen to that guy who attempted to turn himself into a tiger?
he'll be put on parade and made to dance

on that porn site tho, it doesnt tell you what the movie is-it just says "movie-1" 2,3 and so on. so that is the real dillema(however you spell it)(kult0vazazel
well i'd say write into them and say that you'd like the files named better... or find another site

k, i forgot my question.So how bout a kiss?
no i'm not into kissing unless we're fucking

are you serious! that sometimes you answer seriously and some times you dont?
of course... sometimes it deserves a real answer so i give it one

Would you like a peanut butter cookie? McDiablo
no

Is it okay to sometimes get that strange urge to burn things? What can I do to tame these feelings? McDiablo
yes and you tame them by burning things

The clocks went back an hour...did you remember to switch them? *busts a move at the thought of getting an extra hours sleep* McDiablo
yes i did actually... but then again my computer does it by itself and all the other clocks are irrelevant

Why do some people call television the 'idiot box'? McDiablo
it IS one... it shows mostly idiots... produced by idiots... commercials by the world's biggest idiots... and if you just stare at it for hours every day then you are wasting your life like an idiot too... and its mostly a box shape except for those people who have the new plasma screens

Congrats to JCP on getting married for whenever she got married :D and ...I had a q...I really did...oh yeah! Aren't all these high school "Love" probs boring?
she got married a few years ago... and yes love probs are boring and annoying

i want funny stuff on this site. where is all the funny stuff gone? all the really funny stuff, its just old new and not funny anymore since Ive already read it.
what funny stuff? we've never had that here... everything here is completely serious

Do you know the way to San Jose?
yes

I like cheese. Do you believe in the allmighty Cheesus? MrSelfDestruct
no i don't ever since that whole 'swiss cheese' incident

Do you think it's wierd that I have a bird that "loves me" and is fucking my foot? Do you think people look at me funny if I go down the street and I havea bird fucking my head???
yes i would think that's weird... all birds want to do is peck out the whites of our eyes so i'm not sure why it'd be fucking you unless YOU'RE a bird who typed this in using your nasty beak

I want a forum?? lol I can set one of those up for you on my server in minutes bud.
yea? you're going to give me access to admin it on your server too? if you're on some isp connection at home then no thanks...

Will you like to live under my new world order when I bring down the powerful govermental monopolies, and make a world government? ~A/C~
well i'd have to see your 'laws' first

why do all the stupid teenie boppers take all the good tables at the library? - Miss Roger's Sweater
they have nothing better to do then take up space at tables so they never leave

can i wish you a happy Jet Black New Year? - Miss Roger's Sweater
a what?

is it wrong that i enjoy my english teacher's need to be cynical and realistic about everything? - Miss Roger's Sweater
no it's not... you seem to be preoccupied with what is 'wrong' in your life... is it wrong to think that?

i think that drinking slurpees has increased my brain's abilities.. cuz i have memorized my 3-page classical guitar piece.. and McDiablo can tell ya that i have one heck of a time memorizing things. in lit 12 we had to memorize a sonnet and i couldn't do it to save my life.. so do you believe my slurpee theory? - Miss Roger's Sweater
sure... that or you're learning to reguritate things like how THEY try to make us all... resist!!!

My head sounds like an empty box but it feels like it's stuffed with cotton wool. Wassup wit dat? I man monkey finger, banana Wee Jock PooPong McPlop, Zoom, boing, bing, jesus christ SUPERSTAR, wears frilly knickers and a wonder bra. I need help. - Mzebonga
it's all the nyQuil you've been chugging...

whats the easiest way to break up with myboyfriend? i wanna get back together with my ex.
kill yourself

i have a girlfriend. this girlfriend won't talk to me. what should i do about that, sir?
i don't want to talk to you either

why the hell would anybody like to streak in public? do you streak in public? i find it amusing to watch.
i walk around naked all the time... you're welcome to watch and participate

I looked at the cup thing with pictures and that. That's not an experiment, that's sick. I used to see JCP as an omniscient and all-powerful being watching over us all, now, I think she might just be a little bit sick. I mean an experiment to see how long it'll take before someone moves a cup... I don't normally say this in public, but, "EWWWWW". That is the most mingingest thing I have ever seen in my sad little life. I don't know whether to cry over my shattered illusions, applaud for one of the most disgusting things I've ever seen or vomit. Which do you think? - Mzebonga
haha i think that you should continue to worship her... and actually she didn't put the cup there, ver did... so she is waiting for him to clean it up because it's fucking sick and she doesn't want to clean it herself... and why should she? it's vers... but i do like the sick pictures... so you can still applaud

i liked it when you use to update a lot more. i know what your going to say "im not a loser who spends all day on this site" well sorry DC, but I am. And I want answers. Why dont you get some new funny shit?
well to be honest we are working on it FOR REAL... i've tried adding a few new things already... jcp is working on articles too... i'm going to try answering every other day at least again... this whole 'having a real job' thing is beginning to suck and takes away from my time spent here... go to the stuff form and tell us some of the stuff you'd like to see added to or what your fav parts are so we can add more to that specifically

i jsu broke up with my girlfriend,why?
most importantly... why do you think we care? i mean we all break up with people and sure it sucks but damn just shut up already... sit at home and write sad poems until you're ready for the rest of us again

Britney Spearsesesses head won't fit down the toilet and now the cursed thing has just overflown and flooded the room. Is there some other way that I could flush it? FartMonkey
jab a hole in her head to let the air out and then try again

Ok, here's what's going on. You have one more day to live. You are a jelly bean. If the flavor matters, you are a grape jelly bean. What do you do with your one remaining day? FartMonkey
i lick myself to death

When you (well, not YOU) get breast implants, what do they REALLY put in there? FartMonkey
the fat from some other bitch's ass

do you think my guitar teacher noticed that i was watching a plastic bag flying through the windy air while he was talking serious? - Miss Roger's Sweater
perhaps... but he was so into touching the frets that he probably didn't notice

why does Don make me sing with him and my guitar? - Miss Roger's Sweater
he's a lonely man

is it possible to 'drown ourselves in black hair dye'? - Miss Roger's Sweater
yes it is if you get enough of it

can there ever be too much thursday? - Miss Roger's Sweater
yes of course

i enjoy watching others in pain. does this mean im sick in the head. i also like lighters and fire. whats up with that?
no it doesn't as watching others in pain is funny... like that kid i saw wipe out off his scooter the other day... that was fucking hillarious

Why does the phone ring and then stop ringing just as my dad answers it? McDiablo
i blame your dad

Will Miss Rogers' Sweater be okay after she takes her 18 pills? I'm not joking, she has to take a total of 18 pills tomorrow ... will her stomach need to be pumped? Will she be okay later that night in Psychology? I'm concerned about her well-being! McDiablo
18? what the hell? she should sell some of them and make some money off stupid people

What the truck should I be when I grow up? McDiablo
a hummer but not one of those rounded new ones

Are you dressing up for Hallowe'en? Like, as a banana or something? McDiablo
no i was dressed up as a sock monkey but no one wanted to touch my tail

Why is Sin City (las Vegas) so lacking in sin?
i don't know because i have never been there... so send me there and i'll go looking for sin

Yes its that time of year, horny highschoolers stumble into relationships they know nothing about and think its love. In fact thier is no such thing as love only infatuation. How do I make the world understand. (Nameless)
you bitch slap them until their faces are covered with blood

How the hell can Ray like Linkin Park?!?!?!?! Should I strap him to a chair and make him listen to some better music?
no idea... and how do i know that your idea of 'better' music is better? who is to say what is 'better' then what?

Would a shave and a haircut make my life better, or should I buy myself an eye-patch and a sword and start attacking people on the street? (Omuletzu)
i like the eye-patch idea

I really wanna behave like I'm insane and I need some tips. (Omuletzu)
well i'm working on that actually... so you'll just have to wait for that list

Should you have the power to punish any of the people asking these questions, who would you punish, why and how? (Omuletzu)
i would punish those who keep demanding more yet don't send me money ... if i didn't have this whole 'day job' thing then i'd be able to do all the shit you people beg/annoy us for... i'd whip them with a belt on the ass

Ok! I just read the latest questions and answers and got some ideas. First, I think that the cup experiment wasn't desgustpating enough... It needs stench too! What was in that cup and what happened to the "flora" that grew on top? (Omuletzu)
there was rye and coke in the cup... and it is still rotting out there on jcps balcony... she says she will be photographing when she makes ver clean it out

Yep, this site is not enough! We want a forum of insanity and maybe a chat room! (Omuletzu)
<whips omuletzu's ass with belt>

DC, I would love to give you all of my money. All of it. If I had legs like everyone else out there, I would go get a job and give all my money to you. I can't do that. What should I give you instead?
i'd like some printer paper... some pens... and some coffee

would you meet any of your fans on this site in real life?
perhaps... but only if they promise to touch my tail

I love potatoes. Well, I found a potatoe in my backyard, and I don tknow how it got ther.e I dont even have a back yard, so really how did it get there?--Syko Morgana
if i were you i'd take a good second look at that 'potato'

For two years I have been a fan of the insane domain, i sent you a lot of money but it got lost in the mail..... Shouldnt I get some sort of reward?--syko morgana
can you prove you sent the money? if so then i'll send you a reward

hey, do people actually send you money??--syko morgana
that information is classified

this site sucks,you suck and your stupid sock monkey sucks.he said i was ghey and i am not so tell him that he smells like a turd log!ok?
<whips this dumbass with a belt>

My cat is trying to eat a crocheted blanket. This morning she was chewing on toilet paper. Why doesn't she just eat her cat food? Are these other objects snacks to her? McDiablo
maybe she doesn't like her food? try getting her fresh fish

My school gave me a letter reminding me to re-register for next semester. I know deep down all they want is my money. Should I pay them? McDiablo
i say you write them a lovely letter about how knowledge should be free... or ask if they take 'other' forms of payment

Why do Psychology questions have to involve stupid scenarios? McDiablo
what if i decided to answer this question after having a heated arguement with the carpet? do you think that the emotions remaining from the argument will cause my answer to unusually rude?

why when you break up with someone and they say "they want to be friends" they dont talk to you after that
they hate you and don't want to be your friend at all ... in short... they are liars

Well, I've been reading this site about every day for more than six months and I'm still not disappointed in you, which is almost the same as being in love with you except for the part where I realize that we're all just here for the insanity and when we're walking around in the world it's like we don't exist. Is that because I don't really know you or are you somehow "special"? --Enfante Terrible
i am always special... and note that i am NOT whipping you with a belt like i did to those other ungrateful brats

I didn't do the Barbie head thing because I just told everybody what a bunch of cowardly, ass-kissing fakes they all are instead, pointing at fakes as they walked by to make sure that none were left out. Half the people shit their pants and the other half wanted to throw me a party and literally wept as I walked out the door. Do you think I should have just done the head? I looked into it but I'd rather send you the twenty-five bucks the damned things cost.
send me the money and we'll call it even

should we terminate all the people who ask you stupid questions like "what should I do to get my girlfriend back?
yes

i hate my job!!!! so why don't i stop the fucking whining, get of my lazy ass and do something about it??? what's wrong with me?? and why do i keep having erotic dreams about stroking your tail?? it's gotten to the point where i can't wait to fall asleep at night-----marissa
yea? my tail? hmmmm... tell me more about these dreams....

what type of porn do you enjoy? besides sock monkey porn..
all types that don't involve kids or unwilling participants

what if we submitted 2 responses to the what ifs and questionaires? are we only allowed one?
if they are different answers and done far apart in the month so we don't really notice then we let it through

Do enjoy watching sock monkeys have sex?_boogly
yes of course thats why i have mirrors covering my bedroom walls and ceilings

what is your favorite sock monkey position?
all of them that don't involve my tail getting bit or stepped on

well it's on my server t home.... but it's 2 mb dsl. I'm also getting 3 mb dsl soon. So it won't be slow by any standards. Do you want my email or do you wanna guys ill you find me?
send us your email through that form thing we have for that sorta thing

There was a cookie in my butt. Should I eat it?
yes... while it's still warm

Should i dump my 500 pound girlfriend for the hottest girl at school?
you should do them both a favor and fine a comfy hole to bury yourself in

I was at the dentists, and she said to show my teeth... so i closed my teeth together and smiled basicly... i forgot that the dentist had her finger in my mouth, bit her finger, and made her bleed. Who's responsible? -toothcake
its her fault and she owes you an apology

fuck you you lil bitch ass sock monkey!!! you are the one who is the ball licker!!! im gonna fuck your mother while you watch and cry like a whiney lil bitch!!! love ,$$$PiMpEd$$$
yea baby... spank me!

did you REALLY interview Patton???? how cool is THAT?!
yes for REAL! it is very cool and i was surprised he responded!

Dont you think the world would be a better place if everything was solved with mud wrestling... think about all the lives that could be saved in wars and gang conflict.... i truely believe that Georgey Bushy and Saddam Hussain should get a wax put on string bikinis and wrestle in some sloppy mud to solve their problems... thats the problem nowdays none thinks out side the square like the long debate about which came first the chicken or the egg... when it was clearly the rooster - Bouvine
i would actually watch that...

Do you have any wooly, bleating shrubs in your garden?What do you feed them on or dont you feed them?? - The Cheese Mister (Who is a fucked up muppet eating jelly beans mmm!)
no i don't because i do not have a garden and if i did have a garden it would be a dirt garden

Just the other day i was standing in a field (on one leg i might add) when a cow that strangely resembled Jerry Springer, skateboarded over to me and said "moo-oo-moo-moo". What is it that this creature was trying to say?
it was trying to tell you to get the hell out of it's field

The cow question (Jerry Springer) was from HaSbro HaSbro would now like to know how many times i have been abducted by sock monkeys?
no i don't, we keep all of that information on file

The cat ass...the onions...the rotting food. What kind of slobs are you all?
the kind that take pictures of things to share with you all... so are we doing it on purpose to take pictures, or is is just pictures of things we do anyways?

What would you do if I stole some of your sperm and impregnated myself with your child?
i'd be horribly offended

Would you help me blow up a day care center? I dis-like the children inside. This way, all those people who have(or HAD I should say..HA HA HA) children will never have children again, because they will be too heartbroken.
i say we take out the parents BEFORE they have the children

are you a sunny weather(bad) or stormy weather(good) type of person?
i'm a hurricane kinda person

Was your Hallowe'en a spiffy one? I sure hope it was. McDiablo
yes actually because i got the reply from patton... so it was pretty spiffy

What got into me last night...er morning? Who in their right mind would drink pop and eat candy at midnight? McDiablo
i do that every night

My 16 year old sister went trick or treating and some weird lady yelled at her and her friends for being "too old". Would she have been happier if they egged her house instead? McDiablo
they should have asked her that

Have you ever tried twisty tortilla chips? How do you supposed they get them to look all twisty? McDiablo
no i haven't... send me some

1. When you have net curtains, how come you can only see through from one side? 2. How'd they get the widget inside bottles of draught Guinness? 3. How Soon Is Now?
1. that is a problem with you not the curtains 2. i can't tell you 3. very soon

Wow i got a new lez lover ^_^(i'm a chick)what should i do first?~SG* ps you wanna see?
well i'd get her name as that usually comes in handy when dealing with chicks and no i'm not falling for that one again... you KNOW what i'm talking about

Only three answers of more than one line... I'm disappointed... - Mzebonga
yea me too... at first it was just mild disappointment.. but within minutes i was in a full tantrum on the floor... arms and legs pounding the ground in utter outrage... i say we burn the bastards... burn them ALL

I was drunk and can't count... who cares? - Mzebonga
i went around to each apartment door and pounded on it... i asked them if they cared and here are the results... 3 people don't give a fuck... 2 people don't speak english... 1 person has something rotting in the their apartment... 5 people have anger management issues and 1 chick may have started off as a guy

You used the word "spiffy"? - Mzebonga
you have NO proof of that... NONE at all

What did the comfy hole do to deserve a fine? - Mzebonga
we all know why and i'm not getting dragged into one of those 'do you think the aliens did it?' conversations

do you think it is wrong for my dentist to make me take 12 pills before my appointment and 6 after? - Miss Roger's Sweater
yes... i think he's playing games with your head and just wants to dispose of extra pills he's found...

am i going to do well on my in-class essay on tuesday that i am extremely scared of? - Miss Roger's Sweater
mostly yes but once you start writing 'i have pills all the colors of the rainbow' over and over then it's time to put the pen down and rest your head on your arms until the elves stop singing

am i getting sick? - Miss Roger's Sweater
yes

why are my feet cold? - Miss Roger's Sweater
see the above

did the time change screw you over too? i thought it was 6 but it was 5.. the hell? - Miss Roger's Sweater
yes it does that and when you're not looking it goes all warped... damn time <shakes fist at clock>

i'm trying to get my chaste boyfriend to sleep with me, any suggestions? apparently he has principles and although i don't actually have a problem with that i'm horny as hell and need to get laid. he says he really wants to and i can tell from mr. happy but still he insists on doing it after marriage but i;m not planning on marrying as i'm only 19. so....how..? - SiNiSTaR
well i say you get over it, get another girlfriend on the side, or get a dildo... if not then break up and find someone who has morals such as yours and let him find someone who shares his morals

I haven't been on for a loooong time. Know why? huh? Cuz i;ve been WORKING! that's right! what do you think of that? can you guess where i'm working? - SiNiSTaR
send me half your paycheck to prove you have this alleged 'job'... then i'll guess

what sort of coffee do you like actually? black? or what..? - SiNiSTaR
i like my coffee with 2 sugars... no cream... no milk... no nothing else

Why did you not answer my question about Burning every thing? (Nameless)
you didn't give me money first... plus i didn't want to so there

Where do babies come from? -toothcake
stupid people in most cases

Whats a two way (girls suposably wear them...)? -toothcake
i think it's that thing with those clip things... but maybe not

can you hand me a glove of righteousness?
no i've lost it but i can give you the boot of sternness

I think my face is falling off 'cuz it peels a lot when I get out of the shower. What do you think? McDiablo
i think you need to carve yourself a new face out of soap

After chewing gum for about half a year now, Miss Roger's Sweater has gotten the knack for it. She only chews Spearmint, though. Do you think she should graduate to Freshmint? McDiablo
no i think she should master walking and chewing gum now... then to running... and only then to freshmint

My camera has been sitting down here for three days straight. Is it lonely? McDiablo
very lonely... it's been giving the 'eye' to your keyboard

Why is it that when a violent/gory movie with 'explicit coarse language' is played on a Canadian TV station, they don't edit it at all ... but when it is played on an American TV station, they go editing happy? McDiablo
canadians fucking rock

What will I do about the greyhound farm in my backyard?
i would continue ignoring it until you can start that small fire in the basement

What is the defintion of the world "the"?
the: that word that everyone uses... use it today!

Someone put a popcorn fork in my mail box. Should I take this as a threat or just take it as a gift and go eat my pop corn now?
a gift... and what a wonderful gift... you should buy 10 and give them to 10 friends and then have them buy 10 and give them to 10 friends who then buy 10 and give them to 10 other friends and then...

Well, it's offical. I am offically carrying DC's child. I stole your sperm from the sperm bank. yea, remember when you went down there because you needed some extra cash for a sack of bud. What are you going to do about this?
well before slitting my wrists open and bleeding to death... i would remember that i am spermless thanks to that radioactive pizza i ate that one time... so nice try evil one... but you are carrying the child of the crazed alpha monkey with the crooked tail

If you were given two options, one was to kill a pig and then make pork fried rice out of his meat and eat it that fried rice everyday for 7 years or...you if you chose no to that one, you will have to kill 5 cats, but if you chose number two, you get dreams of pigs dying, the blood stains your hands for 4 years and 7 days, and then you will be depressed either way. so which one do you chose?
i would chose not to chose because both suck so i'd just have to thrash about on the floor until it all went away

Do you have a sock monkey girlfriend? or a real girlfriend or whatever..or are you terribly ugly that you cant get a date, or when you do, they find this website and then think your a loser because they find out that you are insane. its okay, dc. we undertand.
i think so but its hard to tell with sock monkeys sometimes and i tell everyone about this website ... its amazing how easily it impresses young giraffes

I'm afraid my friend the woodchuck, the emu, and the double-headed ferret went to the spelling bee, despite my warning. Now, the emu I could care less about, but how do I get my poor mammals back without having to learn about the jungle?
lure them with sugar cubes, wood carvings, end tables and light bulbs

Who is the bogey man??? Where is the Jade monkey???...Why did you steal my underpants.. and have you heard about the geographical migration of toasters???
many different people are the bogey man... kinda like santa... and the jade monkey is in hiding... you can't prove i stole your underpants and of course

should we start fires and then run off into the wilderness?
yes but do not start fires in the wilderness and run into the city

where can I find pictures of shoe tounges?
why not just take your own?

is it true that it only rains when the German gunter kids are about?
no and the person who told you that is a horrible liar

Does jesus love you ?
no

If i ask a question will i get ther best answer ?
no you will get a formulated answer of 'yea we thought we played an alright game but we should work on our defense more'

I like arseny ! I burn things that look old like... People. Why i love arseny so much i diped my hand in gassoline and set it on fire! The other day i find out that some mouth washes are flamible so i pour some into my mouth and set my tounge on fire ! Pyros are cool and no one can deny it ! I am the almighty freak and i shall set fire to all who opose me and my flying spy muse ! So all of you shut your stinky,...filthy...mouth,..ful of.... CORN ! Yes yes your not eating corn BUT I SENSE THE PRESENCE OF YOUR SOILED PANTS and they shall be destroyed in a matter of nano secconeds ! Do i have to ask you to wpie my nose or are you going to lick my dogs ass without me pulling a tapeworn out of my shit !? FukA ???
your question bored me halfway through so i'm going to pretend you asked 'what do you think of that duck who was working over there and then quit?' and my answer is 'damnit those talking lions just don't make any sense'

Does David Halselof spit out magical fire ants to destroy the little piggies roaming around the earth that are trying to poisen our drinking utilities ?
if he did then at least he'd be useful in some way

I DEMAND LARGE ASS MEATS NOW BITCH! Large ass meats for the person of my beingizms.. GEEMEE LARGE asS meaTs Please!?? Will you give me ass meas i pay for demz !
pay first... large ass meats later

should i get one jl audio w7 or shoud i get 2 jl audio 12 w3 ???
i say you just send me money

where do i go to download animated screensavers that deal with cartoons doing things that get them killed or have bloody things going on in them?
no idea but let me know where you found them when you do

if you had a million dollars,brittney spears' bra, and an old sock what would you do with them?
i'd keep the money and the sock... sell the bra on ebay and make more money... then roll around naked in the money until i'm all out of money