Ways to avoid watching commercials
By JCP
Each time we watch our favorite tv shows, we are pelted with minutes upon minutes of commercial time. Now, most channels have even taken a step beyond this, and are actually filling the bottom of screens and corners with logos, ads and more. All in the hopes of burning their logos and products into your mind. Think about all the time you've wasted while commercials played. If you even took half that time and applied it to one thing, imagine how much you could get done?

Design a hood that detects the beginning of a commercial, and drops down over your eyes, as well as plugs your ears.

Plug your ears and sing/hum.

Turn off the TV for 7 minutes, and practice your jedi mind tricks on objects/people in the room.

Jog on the spot, imagining that you're somewhere cool instead trapped in your TV watching hell. At the very least, you'll get in shape you lazy ass.

Write lyrics. Try them out, drowning out the TV

Mute the TV and dance wildly, throwing yourself into things.

Learn to knit, and make yourself a scarf or hat.

Make some great art using cardboard and glue, then send it to us.

Get a sketchbook and draw.

Develop a new form of kick boxing.

Train your pets to make you pizza.

Write a novel, purely during commercials.

Track how much time commercials actually suck up during a one hour period.

Write letters to TV stations insisting they not play the same commercial 10 times in a one hour period.

Phone the TV executives and demand an explanation for them calling shows 'reality TV when in fact it's not reality at all but just more bullshit made up by idiots to amuse the ignorant masses.

Clean your windows.

Create a scale model of ancient castles and buildings using glue and noodles.

Sketch out your place, then mail it to someone you don't know. (Pick an address out of the phone book.)

Remove the couch/sofa cushions and see what sort of fun stuff is in there.

Run around your building/house as many times as you can before your show starts again.

Read short stories, comic books or make your own.

Plot revenge on all who crossed you.

Prank call your relatives.

Go wash your face and brush your teeth you stinky freak.

Smother yourself with a pillow, and maybe you'll wake up before your show begins again.

Get some puppets and put on a show for your furniture.

Come up with clever come backs to conversations you had last week.

Practice making very annoying noises.

Do some laundry so you don't have to wear your underwear inside out for another week.

Bury evidence in the backyard.

Come to this website and do some reading.

Create a list of demands for when you go crazy and hold people captive.

Go take that shit you've been holding in for the last 10 minutes.

Steal some fresh bread, smush it into a wad and toss it around for awhile.

Hide something of yours, then go try to find it.

Masturbate, seeing if you can finish before the commercials do.

Inflate balloons and draw faces on them. Give them names, then argue with them, and kill them off one by one.

Try making your own sock monkey out of your socks. When you fail miserably, burn the evidence and deny even trying.

Get some duct tape and have fun.

Throw things.

Create an imaginary friend and argue with it.

Run a virus checker and AdAware on your computer. Cry if they find anything.

Threaten the TV and everyone who appears on it.

Go outside and scream.

Build a bird feeder, but don't put it up.

Find stuff of yours that you don't want anymore, and wrap it up nicely in wrapping paper. By the time a birthday or xmas arrives, you'll have presents ready to go.

Play guitar

Scream at the TV

Main : Articles : Lists : Interviews : Stories : Questionnaire : Killing the Sims : Insane Q&A :
: About Us : FAQs : New & Updated :

*This site contains material that is intended to offend some viewers. Viewer discrection is advised.*
All content (c)TheInsaneDomain & respective writers. SPREADING INSANITY SINCE 1996!