Two Paperclips
By JCP - Dec 2004 -
Hello. Please introduce yourselves.
Ribbed: Hi I'm Ribbed.
Smooth: I'm Smooth.

Have you both always been that shape?
Ribbed: At first I was straight. I remember that much, but it was for such a short time that it's hard to remember exactly.
Smooth: I have blurred memories of being connected with everyone, and then suddenly I was aware that I was alone. Before I could really comprehend what was happening, I found myself shapely and only then did I realize that before I had been straight. For a long time I was with many others in a dark room, waiting for a job to be assigned to us. Eventually I found myself at work in an office, where I have been for many months now.

Is that how you two met, at the office?
Ribbed: Yes, we were assigned to the same folder of files. We hit it off right away, as we have a similar sense of humor.
Smooth: For awhile I was working on the desk, where I helped keep a project together. It was fun, but I've enjoyed working with Ribbed a lot.

There are many different types of paperclips out there, do you all get along or do you have pointless wars over the differences like some species do?
Ribbed: Oh no, we're much more intelligent then that. We all enjoy hanging out all together in clumps when we can. If we can manage it, we will even link together to form one long chain.
Smooth: Why would we have wars? We're all great fun, and respect each other. All of us, just rubbing up against each other, it just feels good to connect with others. Even the little plastic covered paperclips are fun to be around.

Are there male and female paperclips or are you all the same sex?
Ribbed: I have no idea.
Smooth: I don't know either. I asked a few others once while waiting in the room, but they didn't seem to know either. One claimed to be female, and another said that it was a hehorse. I figured that it must not matter much, or else someone would have made sure we knew about it.

If I asked you both to dinner and jammed you in some mashed potatoes, would you like that?
Ribbed: Sounds like a fun time, why not?
Smooth: Just let me find someone to cover for us while we're away and we'll go!

I said IF I asked you. That wasn't an invitation.
Ribbed: Oh.
Smooth: That wasn't very nice.

Well I mean, for all I know, you're deranged paperclips that secretly want to jab out the white parts of my eyes.
Ribbed: What the hell are you talking about?
Smooth: I have to admit, I was thinking that at first. Now that you've actually said it, I somehow feel like we have a connection of some sort.

Right. Well I have to leave now, I wish you both well in your jobs.
Ribbed: Yea. You too.
Smooth: No really, we have a connection. Take me with you, I'm sure we have a future together.

Listen you messed up paperclip, if you ever contact me again, I'll bend you until you break.
Ribbed: Smooth, get a grip.
Smooth: I can't, I'm Smooth remember? You're the one with the grip.

<JCP leaves.>

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