For you non-Canadians who don't understand the premise of this rant, go here to view the rant that inspired this one. My favourite rendition of that rant would have to be the Quebecois version, whose text is available here.

Hey.

I don't live in my parents basement, and I do have a girlfriend.
I don't want to help you "hack your friends computer",
want to fix your computer problems,
or dress up like Luke Skywalker to see Star Wars.
and no, I don't know Linus Torvalds, ESR, or Larry Wall personally,
although I'm certain they're all good geeks.

I hack kernels, not into networks,
I speak properly, not in h4x0r,
and I pronounce it "deb-ee-an", not "deeb-ian".

I can proudly run linux on my workstations,
I believe in open-source, not patents,
advancing technology, not copying others,
and that the penguin is a truly cute and acceptable mascot.
"Google" is a verb, caffeine is a food group,
and it's pronounced "lih-nucks", not "leye-nucks"!

Linux is the second most used operating system,
the future of computing,
and the sexiest operating system out there!

My name is drunkennewfiemidget
and I am a Linux geek!