Some information about our friend the moon. This should help you tell it apart from a UFO
so you don't run away screaming every time you happen to see it

Humans discover the moon.
Discovered in the late 1500's, the moon has been around for quite some time. While scholars believe that it may have in fact been around before then, they have lacked conclusive proof. Due to today's technology, we can now view the moon easier than we had before. Instead of remote viewing's once a year or two by educated individuals, the average person can now view the moon on a weekly basis from the comfort of their own backyard.

Origin of the moon.
There are various theories about the origins of the moon. So far, no definitive answer has been given, as the moon refuses to answer any and all questions scientists have yelled up at it during the night. There are a few dominate theories about the origins of the moon such as:

1) It is a moon from Mars, given to us as an offering before the Mars people were wiped out.

2) Earth gave birth to it somehow, probably ejecting it from the ocean into the sky.

3) It's an alien outpost, used to watch us and study us. (Those who have tried to prove this have mysteriously vanished or met an unfortunate end.)

4) A giant threw it up there and it never came back down. (Andre the giant once claimed this, but no conclusive proof was ever found, especially considering he wasn't around before the 1500's.)

5) The sun threw up and produced it, and it happened to like Earth, so it decided to hang around for a while.

6) Jupiter gave it to us, as it already has many moons and Earth had none. (It is rumored that we traded some pretty rocks and some flying dinosaurs, but so far no proof of this has been found.)

The moon measures between 2 to 4 inches depending on the night. This is due to the moon warming up near the sun and expanding, then cooling down and shrinking as it moves away from the sun. The moon isn't always seen as round, as during the during the summer months, to prevent getting burnt (seeing as it's so pale) it goes partially invisible. It sometimes does this in the winter as well, but not nearly as much as in the summer. Plans for applying sun block to the surface of the moon has been discussed by various sun block manufacturers, but so far no one has been able to figure out a way to apply it properly every few hours.


The moon is far away, but no one is sure exactly how far, as it is shy and moves away when you move towards it. Due to it only being a few inches wide, it is near impossible for anyone to land on it. The USA made a lovely movie depicting what it would be like if humans were much smaller and able to reach the moon. (While the original movie has been lost, copies of it still exist.) The moon seems to be slowly moving away from the Earth. Where it is going is anyone's guess, though some suggest that if it's an alien outpost, it will likely be programmed to visit other planets after ours, or will return to it's own kind to share the information it's been gathering.

It was previously believed to be made of cheese, but now believed to be a giant rock made of a pumas like material, filled with helium, allowing it to float in the sky around Earth. The cheese theory was proven false after a man from Spain insisted that he had found a moon rock and that it didn't taste or smell like cheese at all. This man also claimed he had spoken with the moon briefly, and that it had a high pitched voice. This led other scientists to believe that the moon was in fact likely filled with helium instead of cheese.

Features of the moon:
The surface of the moon is covered in what appears to be impact craters. Much like the sphinx, it could have been used for target practice by alien races when they were creating humans. The earth itself could have shot things at it, in an attempt to get it to find another planet to bother. Another theory suggests that flying dinosaurs used to nest up there, and that what we see as impacts are in fact just flying dinosaur shit. Why the moon wouldn't have popped when shot at or clawed at by dinos is still being debated amongst scientists who support this theory.

The moon is very dry, so it tries to suck the water off of Earth. This pulls waters towards the moon, creating tides on Earth. Some organizations have been lobbying for the moon to be sent it's own water, as it wouldn't need much to cover it's small surface. Once the moon had it's own water, it wouldn't have to try to steal Earth's. Perhaps then the two could get along and work together. Those who oppose insist that if the moon was meant to have water, that it would have it already and that Earth needs ALL it's water; Earth simply can not spare a drop.

Water on the moon.
*updated Nov 16 09*
Water HAS been found on the moon! The Society for Giving Moon Water (SFGMW) has succeded in sending water to the surface of the moon and NASA confirmed it. SFGMW has plans to continue sending the moon water, helped by both money and water donations via their website - - By 2012 they plan to have a large puddle on the moons surface.

Other names for the moon:

Mr Round Shiny Thing In the Sky
Night God
Hey what's that?
Pie in the sky
Click click whirrr clickity click bark. (Sounds, not the words.)

Blue moon?
The existence of the blue moon has been debated for years. First appearing in texts around 1800, it is now thought that every few years, a blue moon crosses paths with the earth, showering us with blue debris. (Many scientists believe that this is why the sky is blue, as the debris has been building up in our atmosphere for many thousands of years.) The characteristics of this moon are very similar to the regular moon that we see in the sky, leading scientists to believe that the blue moon and the normal gray-colored moon must be twins, not the same moon, both created at the same time and put into motion somehow. Scientists aren't sure why one moon is gray and the other blue, and during the blue moon's next pass, they're are hoping to fire a probe at it and bring back detailed photos of the surface. By examining these photos, and if possible, bringing back samples, they are hoping to find the answer, as well as prove that the blue moon does indeed exist.

Werewolves and the moon.
Don't be silly, werewolves don't actually exist.