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: June 2004 Results

What if hair became offensive to grow on EVERY part of the body?

Then I'd shoot all the monkies and DC. And Ver.- Mzebonga

I already shave most of my hair anyways.. all except hair on my head and back and my chest and stomach... but it wouldn't hurt me to start there... i'd start waxing actually...- SG*

mine does...i think it makes me sexier!- ilovetuna

Tom Selleck better hide. Tar and feathers, maybe a nice big fly strip....- eva psychotic

then those hair removal companies would become super fucking rich, and you'd see a lot of hairless monkeys wandering around.- SiNiSTaR

Hair is offensive already, especially on chests and that gross stuff that seems to grow up from the butt cracks of middle aged men. Nasty. I think hair should be shaved off anyways, but if it grew EVERYWHERE then wow, we'd all have to shave ourselves and take flea baths regularly.- ferretchick

I'd shave my hair off and I'd wear more hats. *nod nod* Hats are fun...- InstantOatmeal

Then I'd grow it very long everywhere it will grow. Then i will cut some of the hair off my head so i can make weave clothing from it. i will weave my home from my hair. i will look like one big, hairy, offensive lump rolling down the street. and the people will call me spanky.- Morshada

Then the offended mofo's better start shaving their asses. - When's Lunch

Then I would run around with a picket sign that read "SHAVE IT OFF! REPENT YOUR SINS OF HARINESS!!" and probably get taken to one of those soft, bouncy rooms..- CasualFatality.

Well, hasn't it? I mean, what with the Amhairicans shaving off every single hair form their bodies, (Even going so far as to intrude upon the colon and Shaving off the cillia there), what's next? Shaving off the whiskers from their emoticons? :smileynohairface:- willies

id have to either start using gallons of nair or get cancer- JAG

I would be rather popular with the gents then. I'm from hillbilly country the men here love that- queenjen

I would be happy be cause i think everyone should be naked an hairless with black eyz- Bitch

then i cud put my 'fuck u' signs back in ma cupboard and stop sticking my fingers up at everybody.That would make m life so much easier...if only!!!- keli_x_james(I'M-BACK!)

Well, since I've had long hair for most of my life, I wouldn't part with it so easily. Who cares if it offends people--no matter what we do, we end up offending someone along the line. If it's that offensive, maybe people won't talk to me. That'd be lovely. I'd make it a point to flip my hair in their general direction just to offend them even more.- McDiablo

That would be O.K I guess.........it would give me an excuse to wax my pubes and ridicule greek people down the beach about their excessive body hair without being arrested- RealmO-K

Gilette, and Nair, and all those other compainies would be rich bastards- Hufflebunny

then i would be in deep shit. oh, bollocks! then my hair would ALL get matted, i'd suffocate and live happily ever after.- Sven the Masseur

Then we would all offend one another - kandi melt

Than alot of peeps would be walking around like penguins and people wouldnt be able to add color to their hair, and like, EVERYBODY would be in jail cuz you cant get hair off ur body, it just keeps growing and growing and growing(like the energizer bunny) OO O O and mcdonaulds mascot would like, totaly be burnt on a stick ;)- Nino God O' Yal

It would suck to be chewbacca, he would look funny shaven and porn profits would down because a lot of money would be used to by razors.- OOmpalOOmpa Or Die

i would be one hair offensive bastard- igor-sevulba

i'm fine with that as i shave everything but my head- amaranthine

Then i would run around like a hairy piece of hair.- The Cady

then sadamn would hav been fucked much quicker- ilike penguins

Well, that would actually benefit the human race! Think about it....with global warming, every 5yrs the earth becomes hotter and hotter...and since we'll have less winters...we'll need less hair. Hair keeps us warm...I become one furry ass woman in the winter because i refuse to shave my legs unless it's for good sex... Yeah but...water shortages will occur in greater numbers because everyone will constantly be in the shower shaving..and new plumbing methods will have to be made or all that hair will get stuck and the showers would overflow! and instead of poop overflowing in the toilet, it'll be hair in the tub..ewww. Not to mention that sunscreen companies will prevail and form monopolies because nobody likes a bald sunburned spotted head and hair product companies will cease to exist. But the funny thing is..that more and more guys will be running around with japenese flags all over their bodies from razor cuts(like when your dad cuts himself and puts the piece of tissue on his face and the little red blood spot in the middle)!! - ChunkyFlamingoTesticles

Then stupid teenagers who think they're so outrageously badass would grow as much hair as possible because they're just that X-TREME. Then they would be arrested and exposed to X-TREME radiation and all their hair would fall out and they'd be sterilized all in one. Actually, I say we do that anyway, regardless of whether they haven't done anything wrong. Being bald would kind of suck though, so maybe just sterilization for everyone innocent(ish) and stupid kids who think they're punk or goth get the radiation. I'm feeling really hostile today. - FartMonkey

oh, we'll next time I shave I won't bawl about all the little/long hairs I murder... by slowly slicing it done to a nub under my retched barly cleansed pores. Oh flanklin, Steven, Marty,Liza, Xavier, Crissy,Katy, Kitty, Toby, Macky,Guss, Jubes, logan, James, Jean,Emma, Lynda, *oooo*... *sniffle*.. Sammy, M.J, kelsolom, Remington, ... *sniffff* ((Well it has become too obvious that I've been excessivly reading X-men comics latley...)) Ohh.. Bobby, Mary, Marice, Forge... Yeah... you get it, I named my hairs, every one... down to unfeminine ones untop my upper lip that would look like whiskers if I allowed growth ...or wouldnt be even notice if i don't poke at my self under ultra zoom, popping pimple examining and mocking my pores for being pack rats and taking every partical and turning it into that disgusting black mush...which i do succusfully get out sometimes but the next day a pimple arrises upon that same place. My skin is a displeasing terrritory where no man should cross... and in my head wont.EVERY part of the body?... so you want to hint THAT. I can hardly believe my crotch is gonna be avoided, the world isnt kind enough to spare me from bikini waxes... or my own self-degrading perception. Why must women be such smooth silky angelic...clean... stomach turning clean... But im a hypacrite I disapprove of skirt dressed women with exposed hairy legs. I must learn to embrace though, perhaps next time I'd compliment on there mat, im sure that wil go well... no, must treat everyone equal... so I'll hmm...I'll check her out... despite my sexulity, I dont have shame. Men and women...why have i been dealing with discrimination of the such latley. I think i may wish.. or be destined to be a smelly minked woman. But thats not feminism is.Oh nevermind. Think about it, if you wish it will do you good man or woman, you are both involved. Exspecially men, Your partake would shed light and with the right manner see this as an actually creditable issue to those iggnorant you must reach to the most. Anyways, I enjoy the feel of hair and if hair chooses not to grow then i feel good about the baldness. We are meant to have hair though, because why would we call it "baldness" if hair wasnt suppose to be there. Well, This is the pathetic revelation I've had today... I have been so slow today... I mean of course my pudding was poisoned earlier, I mean I know the bird only chooses my windowsill to chirp upon, to see what meals I have for breakfast... and i had to kill for that new friggen liver, who turned out to be my father... man... who else lives in my house that smells like pot? and i was actually surprised... when i turned the back-stabbed man over. God damn you cockadilla. - POasod

Baldness would be especially noticable.- Inconvenient

shave my ass- fxdlo2

i will be screwed- earache

everybody will be bald. lights will bounce on those bald heads - MASSIVE ENERGY SAVINGS! and oh, manufacturers of hair removing devices and/or solutions will cease to exist.- sassy girl

I'll fuckin sahve it. what else?- Fuego

then they'd probly invent sum weird machine for shaving all of you. Or people would just live inside and never show their hairy bodies...- Em~B

It is offensive. Especially if you are that fat 60 year old guy that hit on me at the beach...*shudders* He had hair in his ass crack and hair everywhere else and dont make me remember, dont make me remember *rocks back and forth*- monkeeskittles

Then I'd grow my hair out as long as humanly possibly and stroke it against bald people's ugly bald testicles.- Sexy Muffin

Well I wouldn't have to many problems cuz I am not hairy, and all my hair is blond, but dang it I don't know about those bikni and brazilian hair removal things.. that has got to suck... I like the good old razor.~Jeepster

Then I would become really hairy just to piss everyone off- Blood_Junkie

then we would shave an awful lot!- NyHotie

Then I would have a shit load of shaving and waxing to do. But JCP can do my bikini line...- Mzebonga

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