what sort of person were u as a teenager........???.....nerd? asshole? smartass? dumbass? FREAK? hippie? fireman?....what were u?...*rooobbbiiiinnnn*
I was me.  Nerd? No.  Asshole? No.  Smartass? Always.  Dumbass? I've had my moments.  Freak? Define freak.  Hippie? No.  Fireman? No.  I was me.  I was kinda a loner, but had my share of friends.  High school was and is a joke.

what is cefadroxil?
No idea but I'm sure someone will look it up and let us all know.

is santa claus real?
To some, yes.  To others, no.

is the devil okay to worship? -Jessica Gajdos
If you believe in the devil, you have to believe in a God/Goddess.  Do you really have enough energy to do that?

does nike, reebok, and adidas have kids in sweatshops working for them?
Probably.  I wouldn't be surprised if they did.

is there going to be a world war three soon? if so, when?
Most likely and I have no idea. Humans are not predictable enough to forecast that sort of thing yet.  Once psychohistory (unsure of spelling there) is refined enough, then perhaps we'd all know.

What is the difference between monkeysocks and sockmonkeys? Love Sally
Monkeysocks are socks made out of monkeys.  Sock monkeys are monkeys made out of socks.

did you kill the friends list because it was too much trouble?
Yes. We're planning on doing something better.  Probably having people send a twenty dollar bill in the mail to us with their email address.  Then, we send them a few questionnaires to fill out, send them a few stickers and a membership item, then put up a page on our site for them and give them a special graphic they can use on anything they want saying that they are a member of the insane domain sockmonkey club.  I know everyone will have their own ideas/comments so write to me with them...

Umm... DC, that no [?] question was mine, thanks for being so kind and understanding. --GKaos
I try.  It's not easy being the most wonderful sock monkey ever.

Do monkey socks, and sockmonkeys get along?? i am a monkeysock (you said so yourself).... and i just dont wnna get savagely beaten down by someone like you... or you. --Grimmkaos...BTW: Like the enter thingy:)
Yes they do actually.  But conflicts in personality are known to happen occasionally.  Then they beat the fluff out of each other.

Suggestion: Can we send in conversations of our own... I have 3 or 4 that i documented, its me chatting insanely with people on AOL insant Messenger (I DONT USE AOL!!)....Of course, we hafta email em, instead of this submit a queschun thing. WHat do you think?--GK
Hmmmmm... we might set up a contest or something for that.  A good one featured each month or something... sure

to the male in denial... to personify you as female would jeapordize my status as the only self proclaimes female stalker of DC... and if you (being a HE not a SHE) wished to do so that would be ok cuz i'd still be the only female... but if you are in fact a SHE then that would mean that i would have to compete with you to get his attention... but then of course... i DO get to chit chat w/ him on icq... so neener neener neener... as for the question portion, what makes you so sure your not a man huh?!?
Uh... ok then.  Now that people are stalking me, I must inform you all that I also take cash.  You can buy my love.

sorry about that rant... DC where should i send that 10 bucks?
Woah... a soulmate... ha ha ha... send it to the same address as the pussy one.  All our stuff gets mailed there. 

how do you tell some one how much you really love them?
You go up to them and say " I really love you" or something like that.  If it's me, you give me lots of money.  Ha ha ha... that would work for a lot of people though...

Have you ever stopped to wonder why there are a bunch of sock monkeys that look exactly alike?  It must of been hard for that sock monkey mom to that all those at the same time....... OUCH!!
Actually, sock monkeys can't get knocked up due to their not having sexual organs of any sort.  In order to reproduce, sock monkey DNA (fluff) is taken and other sock monkeys are cloned using that dna.  Lots of monkeys can come from one sample.

IF you hold out from going to the bathroom for a really long time, really, really, really long time, what happpens?
It hurts like hell and you'll damage your insides. The longest I've ever held it was for 3 days.  That hurt.

poop on me!!
For a certain amount... I would.  However, they haven't printed enough of it yet so keep your fetish to yourself.

can i ask questions without question marks. please. gargle. moo.
Yes.  But only this once.  After that, no.

u know what ive had a damn bad day? did u? -rObIN
I can just imagine.  However, you still made it here so it didn't completely suck.

why do we park in driveways and drive on parkways? -robin
That's an annoying question that is asked by people who run out of questions.  NEXT

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we  still have monkeys?-robin
Because we evolved from a different type of monkeys that were genetically altered to become smarter.  Duh.

How much longer until all the stupid people realize that life is meaningless and were all gonna die a horrible horrible death almost at an instant? i mean, an asteroid could hit the earth at any minute, or someone could drop the bomb at any minute, and all kinds of stupid people are just running around collecting the rare pikachu cards! why are people so damn STUPID?!?
People are genetically stupid.  It is simply the degree of stupidity that changes.

what rhymes with toilet?
Foil it.

... and if i accept your pity award, does this mean i'm in your debt or something? hmmm?... nikon
Everyone is because I share my wit with everyone.  

why does life suck most the time?
because if it didn't, we wouldn't appreciate those small moments of time that are cool.

Johnen Vasquesz is the vreator of the 2nd best, and the MOST psychotic comic series on the face of the damned earth....oreder is from Slavelabor.com... ive only read 3 pages, and i LOVE it.... the comic is called Johnny the Homicidal Maniac...ANYWAY, Vasquez is skinny, and he has black hair... *jeez, just about everyone fits that descrip. --GK
Not me.  I am blond for starters...  

Which sock monkeys are the evil ones?
The ones who are filled with evil.

Can I use a toy monkey as sock monkey?Do they get along?
Sometimes... it depends on the personalities of the monkies.

To the Nikon thing: For some goddamn reason I have to be a HE? cant there be insane females in the word also? and i get the good question award because I have weird fetishes, bright green clipart is nummy, why cant we all be equals? make love not war
make love, not bratty children that will infest your house with smelly shit and screaming.

i don't refer to myself as being human, i refer to myself as being an evolved monkey..an evil monkey mind you, and i am debating on whether to purchase an unevolved human (a monkey) to observe it's behavior and personality, after all we should all trace our family history, as for you being a sock monkey, are you aware of the fact that you were once worn on someones foot, you could have toenail fungus seeping into your brain, slowly eating it away and spreading down your spinal cord to the rest of your body, soon..very soon you could be just a big yellow fungal THING....are you aware of that?
Yes I am and can't wait.  I'll be all smelly and pussy too.  Yummmmmmm.

i would rather not share my good question award- im not into that, i'll take that one and you can have all the others, and you're right, the bright green is why i'm so drawn to it, but pastel really gets me..especially the easter pastels...ooooo*drools* anyway i have to ask a question, so here goes..everything has to rule before it sucks..its just how it goes, so what point in time did people suddenly stop ruling and start sucking? im guessing somewhere around when that bible crap was supposed to take place..
That is EXACTLY when it happened.  Stupid humans... will you never learn?

you wouldnt happen to look like Johnen Vasquez, would you?? --GrimmK.
Who or what the hell is that?

god i hate you fucking "overlords" who play favorites... why does HE get the award and i don't? because it turns him on? i even offer to deul for the damn rights to the award but NOOOO!!!! grr... pissing me off lately... Nikon
Ha ha ha... poor nikon... how upsettting.  Here... this is for you.... just because you chat with me on icq  

What does JCP stand for?
It stands for her name.  J stands for Jennifer.

Do you prefer pocket size sock monkeys or normal size sock monkeys?
Both are quite enjoyable... although the pocket ones can do nasty tricks that feel real good.

Do you like porn?
Yes.  It is the funniest stuff in the world.

Do you think sex is overrated?
With certain people, definitely.

who wrote the roommate hell article? It was very smart!
I did with JCP.  And thank you!

Have you seen a unicorn.leprichaun or gnomes playing together?
Not recently, although I did miss the last meeting.

no, you didn't read it right DC, i'm disappointed in you, for shame for shame, I asked you why the good question AWARD turns me on, not why this section turns me on, coz quite frankly, it's not my type, the awards are followed by the demented people's questions, THEN your answers, god im glad i cleared that up, you better remember next time or you'll lose another one of your sex crazed maniacs (not really one)
I apoligize for my oversight. The award may turn you on because of it's bright green color.  I also find it arousing.  This is for you and I ...

Are the sock monkeys made from socks?
Only the true ones.  Otherwise they are just leg warmer monkeys.

Do you have an allergy to tattoos? What happens? Do you wish you didn't have the allergy? Love Sally
I am allergic to the rubbing alcohol that is in the ink to reduce infection.

MAN GET RID OF THE VON HUGENSTEIN "WERE OFF LIKE A TURD" THING, DAMN ALREADY ENOUGH IS ENOUGH VERY OLD, TRY SOMETHING LIKE BITE ME AND YES PULL OUT YOUR DENTURES B4 U DO SO !PLEASE .HURRICANE LANECVH
I have no idea what the hell this is about but it's insane so it rocks. And no, don't anyone try to copy cuz that's not insane, that's copying.

YAY! I got a good question award hehehe! Thanks DC Love Sally
Sure, love is such a fickle thing though.  Sigh... I've heard it all... and it all just leads to heartbreak and jail time.

So how are you DC? Love Sally
I am fine... kinda tired... tried to drink a beer last night at a bar... feelin kinda messed internally now... but seems to be ok.

Where can you buy these barbies that you talk about I want them all! Love Sally
You can't!  Too bad though... there was once a company that did release those types of dolls but got shut down by the manufactures of Barbie.

What is patchouli?Do you eat it? Maybe you shove it up your ass?
I think it's a flower or something... JCP has candles that are that scent... it smells ok but I didn't ask what it actually is.  She'd know.

Will anyone ever find the end to the rainbow?Love Sally -PS- I want that gold!
No, because rainbows are illusions and have nothing to hide.  Someday myself, the lovers and dreamers will find the rainbow connection.

Do you think outie belly buttons look ugly?
No, they are belly buttons.  I don't find them attractive or disgusting.  Feet are disgusting though.

You told me there were patterns for sock monkeys but then you told someone else  when they find one tell you but you know the sock monkey pattern b/c you are one don't you? Love Sally
Why would I give you patterns to make another me?  I am a custom sock monkey.  You can make the generic monkeys.. but not me.

So if you are a sock monkey what gender are you? , or do they have no gender? Love Sally
No gender... usually.  I have one but I hide it so people don't rip me apart for scientific study of the gender of custom sock monkeys.

Do you think the cats will take over the world then? If not who would be the best contender to take over the world and how do you think they would do it? Love Sally
Yes they will.  They are waiting until us humans kill most of ourselves off with stupidity.  We're getting there.

So when did you (DC) become a sock monkey?, or have you always been a sock monkey? Love Sally
I woke up one day as one.  It was spooky but I've been warm ever since... my insides are fluff.

Who invented the sock monkeys? Love Sally
No idea... probably some poor person who wanted to make something nice for their kid and couldn't afford a real toy.  So using imagination they made a monkey out of socks. 

Comment on the D'arcy question--she left in September so she could pursue acting.  She's gonna be in a movie called "Peaces of Ronnie."  Also, she just got busted with cocaine. 
Acting? that sucks... 

leonardo de'caprio played a retard in whats eating gilbert grape, why would anyone put such an awful reputation opn a retarrd? its not liek retards get laid or anything...
Sure they do... but Leonardo is just an insult to all retards... no one is THAT retarded besides him.  I can't stand Leonardo... someone should shoot him.

why does getting white ceiling paint on your face suck so bad?
Because you have to scrape it off and that hurts like a bitch.

I like Black, I like Cats, I like knives, and I like Hats.......How about you?
I like black... it's all I wear.  I love cats, I have one.  I like knives, I have many.

would it be possible to skin someone alive and still have them live?
I somehow doubt it but I'm sure that someone out there knows how to.

Why do good things happen to bad people? i seem to have come into a fucking goldmine and i can't for the life of me figure out why. luv Nikon
Because what goes around comes around, and if you haven't done anything bad ever, well then it's just life and deal with it now instead of later when it could suck even worse.

are you an innie or an outie?
My bellybutton is an innie.

What's your favorite color?
Black and if that isn't considered a color, then blue.  hasn't this been asked before?

I have an answer not a question and I'm gonna say it anyway! Why do people like DC ,SANIMAL.........well DC is interesting, charming and good lookin ! (he paid me to say it SANIMAL)HAHAHAHA Love Sally
Yea... stupid sanimal put that on there and then locked me out of the site... grrrrrrrrrrrr

what is the point of the internet?
To provide you with information on other cultures and countries, while at the same time opening your eyes to the rest of the world and what it really happening.

my name is dorf.
So?  Be happy it isn't dork

a horse is a horse, of course?
Unless the horse is not a horse but a house dressed up like a horse.

why does the jabberwocky gymble and gyre so vorribly?
Because you're stupid and can't spell or make up good words.

how now brown cow?
Take that black cat.

why do cats freak out in pleasure when they're getting their backs scratched?
If you are rubbing them just before where the tail begins... then they are getting excited sexually.

are you male or female?
I'm a sock monkey. We have no gender.

how much do YOU weigh?
I have no idea really.  I barely remember what a scale is, I don't own one.

how much does the continent of eroupe weigh?
A lot.  But not as much as Canada. And not nearly as much as America with all it's fatheads.

DC, wheres my fucking box? *now THAT'S a good question*
Not really.  It's where you saw it last.

Do you like sex? Love Sally PS-I'm curious
It depends on with who/what.  Usually it is quite messy.

Are the sock monkeys going to take over the world? Love Sally PS-because I'm scared they will!
They won't for the moment. They are still looking for ways to prevent their fluff from being set on fire.

how far would you go to be loved?
I wouldn't... you don't go places to find love, it finds you.

Do you like the TROJAN MAN?? 
Never heard of it... sounds dumb.

what is the best way to dispose of a body?
Eat it.

you know, working in yearbook on the results of the school polls as i am right now really gets you to appreciate how totally fucking stupid people are. no question here, just that comment.
No kidding. High school is a waste of time and the people who do the best in it socially are the future McDonalds employees with a university education and no fucking clue.

why did d'arcy leave the smashing pumpkins?
I didn't know that had happened!!! ahhhhh!

i have a serious question. i am confused as to which system is better: communism, socialism, anarchy, capitalism, nationalism, etc. which system is in your opinion the best?
DCism.  That's where I tell everyone what is ok and not ok.  In fact, all of those have good and bad points, because there is no such thing as a perfect system if humans are running it.

So whats your day job? Love Sally
I work in a computer department for a large company.

Also why does valentines day suck Love Sally
Because it is a way for greedy people to ask for stupid ass stuff like food and dump others because they didn't cave in to the commercialism.

What is the pattern for a sock monkey?Why is the grey sock monkey with a red mouth the best one? How do I get on your mailing list ? Do I have to pay to get on the mailing list? Australia is a long flight but it's worth it to see such a beautiful place. You should miss people in your chat room b/c thats why no one is in there when you are. I don't smell. I love all the sock monkeys, well I lied just the ones called DC. You should give me a good question award b/c I deserve one!!! Love Sally
I don' know, it's not the best only the most popular, you sign up on http://www.onelist.com, no it's free.  I'm sorry, but no question award... perhaps on another question!

why does the good question award turn me on?
Because it is always followed by something I've written.

DC... set up a duel in the chat... pick a time and date... PLEASE?!?
Hmmmmm... No.  There will be no dueling on the chat!

am i gay?
Completely.

where can i get my own sock monkey pattern?
That I don't know.  You find one and let us know.

I dont know do i?
I don't think you have a clue.

i cant take it to many god damn people are saying i love you can i just take a semi automadic and kill every one who says i love u please pretty pretty please with a cherry on top
I know... loving sucks.  Go ahead.

Did you make that balloon animal guide thingy? I think it was cool:). But ,umm, if you did, why cnat you make a sockmonkey guide thingy?? It would rule. I'm sure everyone would love it!! --Grimm
Yes I did... hmmmm... perhaps I should!

What is the best sock monkey colour?
Grey... with a red mouth.

Can I ask a silly question and get a silly  answer?
Not always... but usually yes.

Can I have a good question award?PLEASE!!!!!!!
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.... no.  You didn't ask a good question.

DC is it possible to love you even though I've never met you?
Could be... but do you love all sock monkeys are just ones that call themselves DC?

Why do I have the urge to have sex with you?
Because I moved, and that met all your needs for a sex partner.

what would happen if i sold my soul 2 satan?
Well, first you have to believe in satan... and if you sold your soul, well then satan would own your soul. Not much else would happen until your death if that's what you believe.

is it better to be famous or not?
Depends on what you're famous for!

how can some people think basketball is their life?
Because their head is as empty as the basketball.

is there a god? explain your answer, please.
I do not use the terms god or goddess.  Both of those mean different things to everyone.  I have a different belief system, and don't use those terms.  So according to my definitions of god and goddess, no there isn't.

why do teapots dribble?
Because the companies that make the teapots are part of the companies that sell burn care products.

(i'm quoting Dead Kennedys) is my cock big enough, is my brain small enough for you to make me a star?
No, and no.   Plus, the size doesn't make you a star... it's what you do with it and to who.

that's it...  I TOLD YOU NOT TO TAUNT ME!!! *starts to cry* it's just that all i ficking wanted was a good question award and you sit there and make fun of me. do you even have a heart? *wipes tears from face* i mean... AND TO THINK I LOVED YOU!!! did our relationship mean nmothing to you? were all those things you said to me just bullshit? OH!! I GET IT!! it was all a ploy wasnt it? WELL THE SEX WASNT GOOD ANYWAY!!! HUMPH!!!
No heart, no it didn't, yes of course they were, it always was a ploy.  I was thinking of giving you one... but this little outburst has made me decide not to... ha ha ha ah ahahahaha...

i like to make up for the lack of numerous different questions with a really long stupid one like that *points up*. work for you? luv nikon
It's quality, not quantity... for once that's true.

i have a feeling that my sock monkey has been stealing my clothes and stuff but he wont admitt that he is doing it what should i do
Rip the stuffing out of him.  That will show him you mean business.

i tryed your idea to cut down on milk and it hasnt worked i find my self eating more now iv start eating it with pepsi and mountain dew it taste good u should try it sometime but anyho im eating more and more ill eat it straight out of the box and everthing i truly need help do u have anyother ideas 4 me
Maybe you should just stop.  Or get a cereal patch to curb the cravings. 

DC, what make u love me so much?  what is your definition for love?  -robin....oh yeah u gave me a green headed thingy ...i was the one with the reeses question....ive always wanted a green headed thingy....thank you ....u turned my blue day to green thanks so much...oh yeah and dont sleep on it!!
Well I'm glad I made your life complete... and I don't know why you would love me. My definition of love is knowing all the stupid and sick things about someone but still stick around.

why wont peter pan come and get me and take me 2 never never land i know im not 2 grown up  b/c i act and dress like a kindergardern i wish o wish he would come and take me away from this place
He won't take you because the last time he did, you ended up molesting all the lost boys and probing tinkerbell with your dirty fingers.

Why dont the different color skittles taste different??
Because skittles are cheap and only had enough money to buy different dyes and not flavors.

would it be ok with you if we wrote down a list of the things we'd forget to do today?
Who is we and I'd like to see the list.

why the hell are so many butlers names Jeeves.? i mean, if you name your kid jeeves youve pretty much mapped out his life.
I have never known a butler... but what the hell kinda name is jeeves anyways???

Who do you think is the most insane celebrity
Hmmmm.... not sure really.  Is Tom Green a celebrity yet??  He's completely insane.

have yu ever talked to that butterworth syrup?
No, her and I just glare at each other.

if i were a cat what whould i be
You'd be a cat.

Why is it that you can fall in love with your best friend, know that you can never have him then hurt like hell becuse of it, and he knows that you like him and he has a g/f.....why does it suck so damn bad?
Because you have no real shot in hell at the moment.  Get over it and live with it.

There was this guy I like, but I scared him by chasing him with knife.  I had fun, but know he's scared of me and everytime I try to get close to him he goes to a corner and yells out "Please don't kill me!!!"  What should I do?
Kill him and find another.

DC describe the perfect mate!!...not a question a command...but if u look at it in a question stand point ...what would the perfect mate be like for u?
Funny, twisted, smart, around my age, good with computers, likes cats, has lots of money to give me so I can work on this site full time and has a sock monkey.

DC if you had 3 minutes left to live and u knew u had three minutes left to live...what would u do to occupy u in your last three minutes on this beautiful green/blue/garbage filled/dirt baggy earth?
I would laugh insanely and smash stuff.   Does it really matter? I'll be dead in 3 minutes!

the people who say that the good question award is for all the questions that suck are actuafdfrgdcgfgfhdddds55564356?
Sometimes yes, sometimes no.

If i were to sit here and answer sensless questions all day... Would i automatically get a psycic ability to communicate with you? 
No, but I would obtain legal rights to kick your sorry ass.

Why is it that people bugged you for the chat room ,yet when I was in there there was noone there?Is becuase they want to avoid me at all costs? I'm not a bad person , am I?
No, it's because people begged for it and then didn't care about it.  Once I set up chat times, hopefully things will pick up.  As for people avoiding you.... I didn't want to be the one to tell you.  You're not bad... just smelly.

Why won't you miss me from your chat room?
Because I just won't!

Do like Australia? I live in Australia and it's the best place to live!
I have never been there... and it's such a long flight!

When will you be in the chatroom? I would love to chat to you , I think!
Well we're setting up a schedule shortly.  I have been really busy lately... but will be setting aside time for chats soon :)  If you're on the mailing list, you get notified when I'm on chat.

Why do you only have a hate mail section? What if I want to send you good mail? Can I still send it to hate mail?
Yes, send it to the hate mail then.  We get hate mail more often then cool mail...

How do I get a sock monkey? Can I make my own?
You buy them and yes, actually you can.  There are patterns!

How do I become a member or at least a friend?
Well, we're going to change that soon... so don't bother for now.  For DemonBoy: THAT'S WHY WE HAVEN'T CHANGED YOUR DAMN INFO

i need help i have a addiction to cerel can u help me
Start by cutting down on the milk...

Im NOT going to ask a question!!!! NO  I TOLD YOU!!  No questions!!  I will die before i ask you a question!!!  LIke.. i.....sasid...no... ZzZzZzZzZ....... Where am i ?
You are not here, but back there where you were when you were not here.

either you or your site is a tad ficked up....the main questions page says last updated February 08, 2000 but its the ninth on the other page
My site engages in time-warping to screw with all your fragile little minds... 

what? i have no life for being a loyal visitor to your damn site?
Exactly the opposite. 

why si it that once you finally get over an x-girlfriend theyre the ones that wont leave you the fuck alone?
Because when you want her, you're a loser, but when you don't, you're desirable.  If you were to cave in and like her again, you would instantly become a loser again, but this time also a heartsick fuck up that her and her friends can laugh at.

cigarettes are government cntrolled, so they why the hell dont they do something about it rather than sit and complain with those hopeless surgeon general's warnings?
Like it matters.  The whole point of those labels is to funnel money into other projects such as testing on humans.  It doesn't cost much to print those labels, but they claim it does, so they can get millions for their secret programs.

whats the point in valentines day
So greedy bitches can be outright greedy and society will smile and encourage it.  It's also a great day for guys to get rid of chicks.  Make them a card with macaroni and *presto*, no girlfriend.  NOTE: I am aware that not all women are greedy bitches and I apologize to those that deserve respect for not being a greedy bitch.

Why won't the ants go away?
Have you asked them why??? They are intelligent, don't treat them like stupid ants.

I was reading your hate people section, typed there was mall people. I work in a mall and you see the same people everyday. Do they have nothing better to do?
Exactly!  You're being PAID to be there... they have NO excuse.  Perhaps they just seek solace in other losers, but are too stupid to speak to each other.

what do you think of the gong "Make a birdhouse in your soul" by The Might Be Giants?
Never heard it, and from the sounds of the stupid title, that is a good thing.

that patchouli question asker is a bitch. i can just tell.
Really?  Does it stink of bitch??? 

should i be the person that creates the new revised keyboard with the backwords R just for KoRn? luv nikon
Sure, but can Toys R Us use it too?

how come there are so many songs about rainbows?
Because everyone wants one, but no one can every really OWN one.

DC, next time you taunt me with a good question award i'm coming after you. how good are you at sleeping with one eye open? *HUGZ*--Nikon
I'm very good at keeping one eye open and sleeping... in fact, at work I sleep with both eyes open.  Oh... and is for me because this is such a great answer.

Whats your fav state in the US?
I don't have one.  Why should I like any of them?  Marco Island is nice... it should be it's own country.  Chop it off of Florida and make it a country.

if you could have any house what kind of house would it be?
A house I could design and have it all paid for on a piece of land that has a river, IS FAR AWAY FROM THE HORRIBLE PEOPLE and have lots of money trees.

how do u eat your reeses?
I eat the sides off, then split apart what is left and eat each half after licking off all the peanut butter.

Will DC ever sleep with me?
All signs point to never.

my freind lost her favorite hat at a incubus concert and she is wicked pissed off because she cant find it were should she look to find it and i want her to find it b/c i dont like her when she is like this
Go online to find a new one, make a new one, or go suck dick until you find someone who can get one.

ok umm hi i was wondering if u would join my new relgion called ducktapism its were we worship duck tape. If it wasnt for duck tape the world would fall apart 
I do not join any religion, no matter how fucked up and appealing.

can i kidnappe you for a day?
Depends on the day and how much we've agreed you can do this for.

Of sanity was insane, that insanity would suck, becuase sanity does. Insanity is good, sanity is bad. They are 2 absouluetly oppisite things. FOR INSANTACE: Sane people suck, they write LAME petitions against cartoon violence and crap. But Insane people watch those cartoons, then laugh at the rats killing each other on thier floor. Saying that sanity is insane, is STUPID! Oh yeah, and writing pettions to stop little pictures from killing eachother is not insane, its STUPIID!! Sanity=bad, INSANITY=Good.--GrimmKaos
REALITY - those kids somehow get guns and shoot their classmates who may or may not watch cartoons.  Whose fault is it now?  

why the hell does that bitch keep asking about patchouli?
how do u know it's a bitch?

will you give this question a good question award just cuz you like me?
Now that wouldn't be much like me now would it?

This is to taunt you.  No, this is not for you.

have you ever just wanted to take off out to the country somewhere. maybe to a cabin deep in the forest, just to get away and aborb all that surrounds you? is it stupid to want to do something like that?
That is exactly what I am planning to do. I just need a bit more money.  Anyone hiring in Ottawa???

if i were to go up to a sock monkey and tell him that i love him...Do you think he will just sit there and look at me or be like "i love you too" or be like  "i hate you"?  Cuz you see my sock monkey.. when i told him this he just sat and looked at me!  Then when i came to check on him he had been hung by a thread noose! AND my cats were batting at it!  What do you think got to him today?
It really depends on the monkey.  Your monkey seems to be loveaphobic.  He filled his ass with catnip to get some attention and it backfired.  I think you should take him to a monkey doctor.

what's your favorite position to use for sex?
To USE?  Uh... the position where I get money once I'm done.  That works well for me.

so that hairy lump on your ass is a sock monkey? i seriously thin it's lie a bad case of hemmeroids or something. oh FYI did you now preparation H is the most shoplifted item ever? thought i'd share.
Well who wants to buy it? How embarrassing. I stole some last week.

why is it that soccer moms (you know the ones in the mini-vans on the cell phones while turned around in their seat yelling at someone) are always the ones to cut you off in traffic and then flick YOU off?
Cuz they are STUPID and should stop yelling at their kids all the time and letting them get away with murder.  They have no lives so they live through everyone else.

i am honored that my question about our stupid wrestling got a good question award. and as you suggested, my friend recently ripped our ceiling fan out and threw it at me in a match. so now i have a new question. how do i explain to my parents the newly acquired stitches in my head?
Tell them your brain absorbed so much info at once that it bust open your skull.  They'll be proud.

Why would anyone want a shoe that tells you how fast you're running and how high you can jump?
Because the people that buy those shoes have nothing better to do with their lives or money.

what do you think of the dead kennedys?
They are fun and enjoyable to listen to.

when are you going to update the friends?
Maybe never.  Now SHUT UP.... I'm trying to move away from here!

patchouli doesn't really leave a patchouli smell, at least i don't think so.
I can't say I would know what patchouli smells like.  I'll ask JCP, she has patchouli candles for sale.

Question, why the hell did that wrestling question get a good question award? what kind of crap is that? IT'S CRAP!
Exactly.  Now you see why.

what the hell is a community question?
it's when it takes a whole community to come up with a question.

do you think insanity is non-sense,because i see alot of non-sens here.e
It is only nonsense to you because you can not think outside of your programmed box.  It will appear to be nonsense to you until you see the patterns and the validity of it all. Sanity is insanity.  When you get that, it will all make sense.

were you sitting in my chair?its still warm so i know it had to be either you or moltar.
It was moltar.  You can't prove otherwise.

Okay!!  Luckey Charms... Have you ever thought about them??  i mean there is some little lepricon guy just zapping them from thin air and putting em in boxes to feed us.  Have you ever thought about whats in those rather descusting "marshmellows?"  And another thing!  those kids like walk all over them then eat em!!! thats sick.. Lucky charms DONT fly!  And there is ABSOLUTELY nothing at the end of a rainbow!  Ive looked!!   This stupid TV!!!  Okay they show stupid mind numbing comercials that go nowhere! IT DRIVES ME NUTS!!! by the way.. How are you today?
I am fine.  Thank you for asking.

why do hippies smell like patchouli?
It's not patchouli.  It's pot.

would you eat fried green children?
No. I don't like fried foods.

why is it that only five people have voted for the community question? you know what im talking about.
Because only five people figured out how to vote for that option.  It's insane but true.  

dont you think if a product accutally was lower in fat tast the same or better and was more nutrishs that the company would make the old product obsoleat?but they still have to sell the old product and confuse you with the new product just so they can make more money.
It is exactly the same product, but this way they can sell it to the 'healthy' people as well as the people who 'eat what they want'.  It's another corporate mind fuck.

I have a question. im well aware that wrestling organizations say not to emmulate what they do on TV at home, but oh well, me and my friends do it anyway and tape it all so we can look back at how stupid we are. So anywho, the other day i let my friend powerbomb me through a table, then i eventually got up and tried to land and elbow to my opponent who was laying on a table when he rolled out of the way, and BANG through the table i went. what can i possibly do for an encore the next time we do it? oh by the way, your answer to the killer for hire wuestion was pure genius.
Perhaps you should try to somehow produce a hole in the wall so that you can see into another room, or even breaking a water pipe of some sort.  If all else fails, try ripping something out of the ceiling and throwing it at each other.  And thanks.

is it just me or does noone care about the superbowl this year?
The what??? ha ha ha...football sucks.

does something wreak of pickles to you too?
Wreak?  Uh no... although I am now interested in getting pickles... mmmmm....

Why do people at burger king use a microphone to talk to you while taking your order and then yell to the people in the kitchen?
Because the people that work at burger king like to fuck with the teenagers that they hire.

Hey, me and a friend are forming a band, what name do you think iis best? Soul Decay, Bloodstone quarry,sweet hate, or cry od blood?
Bloodstone is ok... but the rest sucks.  What type of music really depends on what type of name you'll need.

well if your ass isnt hairy then that must be mold growing back there because there is definately something fuzzy on your ass.
Oh THAT... no that's the sock monkey that refuses to come out of my ass.  It's getting painful actually.

hey where r u right now?  what r u doin'?  how's your grandmother?  what color socks do u have on?
At home. Answering this question.  Which one? None, I'm barefoot.

Why is it that in the United States, you have to wait till your 21 to drink or gamble???....thats why i go to Canada to do that...
Because it just is. Canada rules.

who is better.... wallace or gromit?.. if gromit.. Would you like some cheese?
Cheese is always good... but the best is the really old cheese.  Many a days have been spent nibbling on some old cheese.  Mmmmmm.....

im looking for a little image of a drummer monkey for my page, you know the little toy monkeys that either play plastic drums or bang cymbals? ok well anyway, know where i can get one? i cant find one anywhere and it's really really important so please..help!
Actually I do not. Try buying a clipart cd!