- Where insanity runs rampant!
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: February 2005 Results

You're in the ocean splashing around in a life jacket because you were doing something stupid and got too far from shore when a shark comes up to you and tells you that actually, dolphins are stupid little assholes who like to bitch on about blowholes all day long. What if it agreed to take you back to land and safety if you promised to tell his story to the rest of the world?

I would agree, then when I got back to the beach I would get a shotgun and shoot the shark, because he badmouthed dolphins, and I like dolphins.- chaos_zero

I wouldnt but say i would and go home and eat nachoes. with cheese.- Jord

I WOULD DO IT and then i'd stop smoking my crack.- Rachie pookie poo

i would cry out in a trembling voice "oh, i was looking for you for so long ! i knew i was right, and sharks actually save people ! of course i will tell your story to the world !" Wait until he takes me to safety and then, when on terra-firma i'd give him the finger and say "gotcha, you big oversized mackerel! haha !" of course, he is probbly making fun of me, and he'll eat me before taking me to shore, but in that case, i'll give him a terrible indigestion, and diahreea and colics, and cramps, and other nasty stuff... that's how evil i am ! - blinder

then the mint would have taken over too! what in the world is happening! were all going to die! aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! and goooooooooooooooooo! crunchy goo to be exact!- crunchy_goo_shall_take_over! i_swear_its_true!

I'd kick him in the "jimmies", noone talks about my birth mother that way.- j0eg0d

I'd say it was a deal. Sharks get bad press as it is. I red a statistic that said more people are killed each year in accidents involving vending machines that are killed by sharks. Besides, it's not like anyone would actually listen to me...- Mzebonga

He can tell his own story, I'm having enough problems fending off amorous mermaids, Odyssean syrens, moist bints throwing swords at me and, slightly disturbingly, the advances of an indeterminate number of lavicious penguins.- Fish

I'm not sure I should trust such a large shark, I think to myself, and then realize that it is my only hope as there are no dolphins since the 2020 melt down, and now sharks were friendly because they have been given genetic transplants of human genes and are brain washed by the grand soveriegn commander of all stuff that is around him within his power to posess. So I say sure 50 creds ok as a fare?. The shark turns around and says sure will get me proton fuel for my shatterray. So we go back to the shore in through the under canals for the large ships, and come apon a human dolphin dock worker who has a blow hole in his fore head, and we say like hey nice blow hole and he gets mad and starts to complain about it that he always works on land and hardly has time to go to the ocean and use his blow hole! and also its a drag when I am picking up chicks, soon as the think I am half fish I am angry and they are grossed out he screams turning purple and drooling snot out of his blow hole!, the shark and I just look at each other and shrug and I go back to my holography studio.- thathingguywhois

When will people get it through their thick heads that you can't trust sharks? He says he'll take you to safety, but he'll really take you to New Jersey.- PRchick

Naturally, I'd remove the zipper on the life jacket (I'd have a zipper because the ones with only buckles are weak) and proceed to flay said shark with it. He'd die because talking sharks are also quite weak, and then I'd float on his carcass back to shore. Or out to sea. It depends, really.- theinsane

"What a HUGE story!", I thought to myself. I agreed and he took me back to shore. When I got back to my apartment, I forgot about the whole thing and played DDR for 3 days. When I woke up the next morning, I heard my doorbell, so I got out of bed and answered the door. When I opened it, it was that crazy shark. He said," We had a DEAL. Since you failed to cooperate, I have to kill you." He then opened his breifcase and pulled out a banana, peeled it, and stuck it in my eye. I fell down and he left. I sat for a good hour untill I realized I got stabbed with a banana... So I got up and played DDR some more.-me

I would promise as long as it'd eat a dolphin in a my view, and not eat me, and I would definately tell his story.. because I'd believe it.- SG*

i would agree,a talking shark is not a common site unless you are on drugs or myself on drugs. let the truth be told after all we have lots of assholes on land why not there be some in water to. - killer

I'd go further--I'd ask the shark to take me to the closest pod of dolphins in order to, well, torture them for their bitchiness. No one likes to hear any bitching, sharks included. How do I torture these dolphin? We-ell...*clears throat*..."They call him Flipper! Flipper! Faster than liiiiiightniiiiiing..."- McDiablo

la la la la la la huh? omg dude!!!! What is with all these animals talking to me all of the sudden? Have i become Mrs. Dr. Doolittle or somethin? That'd be kinda cool but not when SHARKS are talkin to me. But I guess I'll tell him and promise and then when I get to shore I run away and don't tell ne 1. Humans lie, the shark will get over it.- BoredBlondChick5

Ah, I would say sure. Then, after it took me to shore, I would get my Uzis, and shoot the hell out of it. After that, I would collect the teeth, make a necklace, and bathe in the blood of a thousand vegtables...- Asylm Chik

Stupid things always led to needless mind-boggling shit... I must learn how to read someday... I heard those literate ones are highly admirable and rarely find themselves paying a hooker to pee in thier mouth but instead find a "lover" as they call it... *shudder*... I swear it was like jello *shudder* And I've always been frightened of sharks I quess those dolphins are better communicators with those warm and open smiles as they leap and dance while praising the human race for being more superior with our divine endless supply of fish... um.. I wouldnt be able to stop saying SHARK SHARK ANNHHH YIII SHHHARRKK... swallow some water and repeat.. and not an attractive woman in distress but one that flops around like a seal and gargles with worry as she licks her snot over compulsive goat shrieks...over all that noise I wouldnt be able to hear his story... but if he talked I'd begin to say SHARK? SHARK? aammm ooo Shark?... over and over... he'd relize this person can't communicate a thing and most likley serve me dinner with a nice dance until the sun falls and he escorts me home.- Tireless Train

TELL THE WORLD!!!! I don't wanna die!!! I might anyway, though.- Anna

I'd call a press conference and calmly explain what Mr. Chompy(The Shark) told me, of course, they won't believe me, just like all the other things, with the UFO's and such. I'll be labeled as crazy and stuck back in an insane asylum and spend my days making little dolphins and sharks, and have the dolphins complain to everyone about anything.- Monkeeskittles

id have him take me to shore and then we'd blaze up. oh and id put his story in high times for the wolrd to read.- jiggz420

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